Here is the latest offering from the Churches Advertising Network. Every year, the Network produce adverts for Christmas. The idea is that churches then pay for them to be used in local media. Quite a few of their campaigns have resulted in lots of grumpy people saying, “That’s rubbish, I could do better” which is then broadcast along with the original ads. This ensures that the ads get a wide hearing, alonside the traditional Christan message of grumpetyness with one another for which our faith is famous.

This year, the Christian Advertising Network is building some of that into the campaign. People, (by which they mean young people 18-26) can have a go at writing something better and the best script or audio that they receive will receive £500.

I don’t think that the horse racing commentary above is the worst work that the CAN has produced. However, there is no chance of us using the accompanying football commentary as it does not use language inclusive of men and women:
[audio:football_match.mp3]

Just in case you think these are really terrible, take a reality check by comparing them with the advert which the diocese of Lichfield published in football programmes last week on Back to Church Sunday.

The risable copy reads:

“Your local bishops are very excited about tomorrow’s new signing… you!
The 28th September is Back to Church Sunday – and thousands of people will be flocking to the terraces, er, pews, of their local church to join the millions of people who already go every Sunday. Why not join them? We may not offer a pie and Bovril at half time, but many consider a cup of tea or coffee and a bit of banter after the final whistle, er, prayer, a decent substitute. Whether you’ve been ‘away’ for a few months or many years, it’s time to come ‘home’. And because Jesus has already taken the penalty, you can be saved! Come this Sunday, and find out whether it will be 442, 343 or a completely different opening hymn.”