Here’s the final video in the series of conversations that I’ve been having with Marion Chatterley the Chaplain at Waverley Care.
World AIDS Day video 2014 from Kelvin Holdsworth on Vimeo.
In this video, the tables are turned and Marion gets to ask me the questions.
She starts by asking me why churches don’t seem interested in HIV AIDS issues during most of the year. We talk about people in pews and pulpits who are themselves living with HIV.
We talk about why there’s stigma around HIV and return to the connection between what the churches and their leaders have been saying about marriage and keeping people safe from HIV.
I remind Marion that there’s only a few hundred yards of Scottish streets where gay people might feel comfortable holding hands and talk about why relationships are still frightening and still being hidden because churches are not challenging discrimination and are indeed promoting it by their language around sexuality.
We talk about the phrase “Well, it isn’t living up to God’s ideal” and the way that my denomination is failing me as a priest.
We talk about early HIV prevention campaigns and what the churches might be saying now. We also talk about the churches’ obsession with acts and bodies and how I think that while current policies from church leaders focussing entirely on the sexual element of relationships remain then the devil will go on winning.
We return to the theme of healthy relationships that has come up in each of the videos, including negotiation in relationships and how to find someone you can stay safe with.
The other conversations can be seen below.
marion chatterley #3.movie from Kelvin Holdsworth on Vimeo.
marion chatterley #2 – healthy relationships.movie from Kelvin Holdsworth on Vimeo.
What an interesting series of conversations you had with Marion Chatterley.
I found them fascinating and could not get them out of my head. What struck me very powerfully was when both you and Marion agreed that “The Churches” do not talk about, discuss or give any guide lines to people about “Healthy Relationships” with other people.
We are all people, doesn’t matter whether we are young or old, black or white, man or woman, straight or gay, or any other sexual persuasion, we all have hang ups, idiosyncrasies, ill conceived ideas about what other people think.
When you are young you haven’t learned how vulnerable you become when you go into a relationship with another human being and that it can become a very painful experience if it all goes wrong.
These are topics that should be talked about within a caring Christian fellowship, where embarrassment hopefully could be overcome, and a general frank discussion on the dangers of promiscuity, how do you know what is right for you, how can you possibly know when it is right to go a step further in your relationship, etc. etc. Just talking, sharing and caring !
As I said to you this morning Kelvin, I think that you would be an ideal person to help “The Churches” realise it has to get involved in every day problems that all people have to deal with.
Sorry to have gone on and on, but I think it is so important, hope you do too.
Thanks Peggy – that’s a helpful comment.
I’ll have a think about it over the next few weeks. I’ve one or two ideas as to how to take this conversation on a bit.