What is in Kelvin's Head?

10 Correct Opinions About Christmas Carols

27/12/2018
Public service announcement.

The following opinions are all correct.
1. The first carol on Christmas Day should always be Christians Awake Salute the Happy Morn. It should be sung lustily and with the last line repeated.
2. While Shepherds Watched Their Flocks By Night may be sung to almost any tune. It must not, however, be sung to the tune Winchester Old
  - Acceptable tunes shall include:
    
    Liverpool
    
    Glasgow
    
    Lyngham
    
    Old Foster
    
    Sweet Chiming Christmas Bells
    
    Cranbrook – This may only be used once in every decade in any one place. There’s a limit to how entertaining it is.
3. The best carol of all is It Came Upon the Midnight Clear and it must be sung to the tune Noel by Arthur Sullivan. There are many things in which the US based Episcopal Church is correct but it is incorrect in its choice of tune for this carol. It may also be sung at Michaelmas. The incorrect words “It Came upon a midnight clear” are anathema. They have as much place in the Christian faith as Sundays before Advent or Sundays before Lent – ie none whatsoever.
4. Jingle Bells is not a carol.
5. The carol Of the Father’s Love Begotten may be sung at any time from Advent Sunday until the Feast of Candlemas. It must only be sung to the words agreed by Mr Frikki Walker and myself. The verse about seer and sybyl must always be included as it is both profound and reminds us all of Sybil Fawlty. I have every intention of broadcasting this carol unto the nation at the earliest opportunity so that everyone else may copy the St Mary’s version of the words.
6. 10 points may be claimed for anyone spotting a heresy in any carol. A bonus of 50 points is awarded to anyone who can come up with a heresy-free version that people will enjoy singing.
  - Your starter for 10 is “Veiled in flesh the Godhead see” which sounds like Docetism to me.
7. Anyone claiming that carols should be sung “in the original version” shall be required to sing Hark How All The Welkin Rings at the next carol service they are at and will then be required to explain to everyone at the door what a welkin is.
8. In the Bleak Midwinter may be sung, even though Jesus probably was not born amidst snow. However, it may only be sung by a good choir singing the Harold Darke version.
9. O Come All Ye Faithful is a Jacobite rallying call and is most proper for Scottish Episcopalians to sing.
10. Christmas cake should be eaten with cheese and not marzipan and icing.
Thank you for your attention.
Christmas carols

6 responses to “Dialogue des Carmélites”

Moyra

25/06/2008

Mmmmm now you’re giving me ideas!

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Rev Ruth

26/06/2008

Oooh, I have that on CD and haven’t listened to it for ages. Love that chopping sound!

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kelvin

26/06/2008

I was told that some kind of scaffold had been rigged up offstage complete with block and tackle to provide the definitive thud as nun by nun, they fell to the floor.

The stage was littered with dead nuns by the end.

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david

26/06/2008

It is a real shocker at the end. Liked Poulenc’s music, and the singing was good (Monday performance).

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Jonathan Ensor

29/06/2008

Attended the performance on Thursday. Particularly liked the voices of Mere Marie(Elysia Leech) and the Father Confessor(L’Aumonier), James Geer.

Tim Dean led the performance admirably and there was hardly any poor casting although obviously with a student performance some were better suited to their roles than others.

James Geer is to be singing the Male Chorus in Britten’s “The Rape of Lucretia” at Aldeburgh-a favourite opera of mine with the Pagan story offset and contrasted with the choruses commenting from a Christian perpective.

It was good to see(at a distance) Donald Maxwell and Linda Ormiston in the foyer before the performance, both professional singers of some distinction. I remember them both from Good Shepherd Chorus performances at St Mary’s years ago.(Donald Maxwell sang the baritone part in a performance of Elgar’s “The Light of Life” and Linda Ormiston, who studied maths at Glasgow Uni and singing with the late Winifred Busfield who taught me, sang the alto part in Brahms’ Alto Rhapsody under Christopher Seaman.

The staging of Dialogue des Carmelites was very effective and succeeded in conveying most of the pathos of the final scene without gross exhibitionism, which would have made it unbearable to watch.

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John Woodhouse

29/06/2008

It’s a great work – saw it at ENO.

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