What is in Kelvin's Head?

  • Liturgical news

    Here is the liturgical news from St Mary’s Cathedral, Glasgow yesterday.

    • The Provost announced during morning service that the church is responsible for far too much condemnation in the world and far too few blessings. He and the Vice Provost then went on to offer the ancient Blessing of the Throats traditionally performed by holding candles to the throats of the faithful on St Blaise’s Day. About 45 members of the congregation had their throats blessed.
    • There have been no outbreaks of any diseases of the throat since yesterday.
    • The Provost turned into a flailing jellyfish at two points during yesterday’s mass. The first was the result of him seeing the gospel procession going past him and on down the aisle before he had woken up to the fact that he was the deacon and due to read the gospel. The second was when he tried to retrieve and consume a fallen host during communion. This resulted in a manoeuvre that is known as being Slain in the Spirit amongst low church people and known as falling Amice over Tippet by high church people.
    • The Provost was dismayed at the end of the mass to have it pointed out to him that the mass may not have been valid as he was wearing his stole in the manner of a priest rather than in the manner of a deacon.
    • The Provost then used the fact that his stole was the wrong way round to justify the fact that he had forgotten to follow the gospel procession earlier in the service.
    • Black shoes were worn throughout.

8 responses to “Synod – membership”

  1. Stewart Avatar
    Stewart

    Kelvin – you are very modest in not describing your contribution to this debate – I guess it was in your usual style.

    Reply
  2. David |dä?v?d| Avatar
    David |dä?v?d|

    Kelvin, I have lurked and read here for some time. I am curious about happenings in sister Anglican churches. I live in the Diocese of Northern Mexico of the Anglican Church of Mexico. American English is a second language for me.

    It is difficult for me to follow much of what is written here for two reasons. You all speak a cryptic or clipped form of English at times, even different from what I encounter from the Mad One. You also use a lot of jargon and acronyms associated with the Scottish Church.

    This is all OK if you intend your blog to be mostly catering to fellow Scots. However, if you are open to a blog with more international following you all might keep my points in mind when writing.

    Reply
  3. David |daveed| Avatar
    David |daveed|

    I usually try to give the Spanish pronunciation of my name, as opposed to the English, but you blog does not like the augmented letters!

    Perdoname.

    Reply
  4. chris Avatar
    chris

    Glad to see you got your connection going again – I’m impressed with your speedy blogging!

    Reply
  5. agatha Avatar
    agatha

    But what was the motion though? You can’t say it failed without telling us what it was.

    Reply
  6. Kelvin Avatar
    Kelvin

    The agenda and papers are available here:
    http://www.scotland.anglican.org/index.php/news/entry/general_synod_2008_agenda_and_papers/

    These have all the motions and the preparatory materials.

    Thanks for your comment, David – I’d be happy to try to explain any technical terms. Synod is quite confusing enough when English is your first language.

    If you take a look at the papers that I pointed to above, you will see that the synod members all have a large book in front of them.

    The motion which failed would have updated the way in which membership rolls are compiled to allow people to know whether or not they are on them. At the moment, membership rolls are compiled by rectors who do not need to tell people that they are included on the roll even though they may have liabilities thereby.

    Reply
  7. agatha Avatar
    agatha

    As one of my bosses used to say “all aid short of actual help”.
    If you can be bothered summarising what all the speakers say why couldn’t you take another couple of minutes and summarise the motion?

    Reply
  8. Kimberly Avatar
    Kimberly

    Perhaps what hasn’t been clear to readers who have come upon this post from further afield is that Kelvin was blogging the buisiness of synod in real time. That is only possible in short hand — and therefore probably of most use to those who are unable to be at synod, but broadly aware of the debates going on in the church.

    So, perhaps we can let him off the hook for not being all things for all people while blogging from Synod, and be thankful for the wider pattern of good communication that we usually see here.

    Reply

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