What is in Kelvin's Head?

10 Correct Opinions About Christmas Carols

27/12/2018
Public service announcement.

The following opinions are all correct.
1. The first carol on Christmas Day should always be Christians Awake Salute the Happy Morn. It should be sung lustily and with the last line repeated.
2. While Shepherds Watched Their Flocks By Night may be sung to almost any tune. It must not, however, be sung to the tune Winchester Old
  - Acceptable tunes shall include:
    
    Liverpool
    
    Glasgow
    
    Lyngham
    
    Old Foster
    
    Sweet Chiming Christmas Bells
    
    Cranbrook – This may only be used once in every decade in any one place. There’s a limit to how entertaining it is.
3. The best carol of all is It Came Upon the Midnight Clear and it must be sung to the tune Noel by Arthur Sullivan. There are many things in which the US based Episcopal Church is correct but it is incorrect in its choice of tune for this carol. It may also be sung at Michaelmas. The incorrect words “It Came upon a midnight clear” are anathema. They have as much place in the Christian faith as Sundays before Advent or Sundays before Lent – ie none whatsoever.
4. Jingle Bells is not a carol.
5. The carol Of the Father’s Love Begotten may be sung at any time from Advent Sunday until the Feast of Candlemas. It must only be sung to the words agreed by Mr Frikki Walker and myself. The verse about seer and sybyl must always be included as it is both profound and reminds us all of Sybil Fawlty. I have every intention of broadcasting this carol unto the nation at the earliest opportunity so that everyone else may copy the St Mary’s version of the words.
6. 10 points may be claimed for anyone spotting a heresy in any carol. A bonus of 50 points is awarded to anyone who can come up with a heresy-free version that people will enjoy singing.
  - Your starter for 10 is “Veiled in flesh the Godhead see” which sounds like Docetism to me.
7. Anyone claiming that carols should be sung “in the original version” shall be required to sing Hark How All The Welkin Rings at the next carol service they are at and will then be required to explain to everyone at the door what a welkin is.
8. In the Bleak Midwinter may be sung, even though Jesus probably was not born amidst snow. However, it may only be sung by a good choir singing the Harold Darke version.
9. O Come All Ye Faithful is a Jacobite rallying call and is most proper for Scottish Episcopalians to sing.
10. Christmas cake should be eaten with cheese and not marzipan and icing.
Thank you for your attention.
Christmas carols

8 responses to “Mitre over the parapet moments”

Kimberly

11/04/2008

Thanks for linking +David’s post. I’d read it, and the first few comments, but missed that later discussion. It represents a new level of blog dialogue in the SEC, I think.

Reply
Rev Ruth

12/04/2008

Who’ll be next, do you think?

Reply
Anonymous

12/04/2008

Thanks for the episcopal summary – I take back my previous criticisms about the bishops. They are being rather splendidly thoughtful at the moment. As was Archbish Sentamu on Radio 4’s question time 🙂

Reply
bishop david

12/04/2008

Kelvin – thanks for your linking and attention-drawing activities. It’s hard not to be aware that there is a common thread linking all of those ‘over the parapet’ contributions – which is that the tone of recent contributions from our Catholic colleagues has been unfortunate. But now that we seem to have some momentum, I hope we can move on to be a bit more successful at shaping an agenda rather than simply responding to others.

Reply
Duncan

14/04/2008

What’s the clergy equivalent of a mitre over the parapet?

A biretta over the altar?

Reply
Stewart

14/04/2008

…only when it is snowing!!

Reply
kelvin

15/04/2008

I can see snow on Cruachan. Birettas may be worn.

(See number 79 of my 100 things if you’ve no idea what Stewart is alluding to).

Reply
Phil

21/04/2008

I am afraid the discussion with +David on his blog came to a sad end….have another look!

Reply