What is in Kelvin's Head?

Liturgical news

04/02/2013
Here is the liturgical news from St Mary’s Cathedral, Glasgow yesterday.
- The Provost announced during morning service that the church is responsible for far too much condemnation in the world and far too few blessings. He and the Vice Provost then went on to offer the ancient Blessing of the Throats traditionally performed by holding candles to the throats of the faithful on St Blaise’s Day. About 45 members of the congregation had their throats blessed.
- There have been no outbreaks of any diseases of the throat since yesterday.
- The Provost turned into a flailing jellyfish at two points during yesterday’s mass. The first was the result of him seeing the gospel procession going past him and on down the aisle before he had woken up to the fact that he was the deacon and due to read the gospel. The second was when he tried to retrieve and consume a fallen host during communion. This resulted in a manoeuvre that is known as being Slain in the Spirit amongst low church people and known as falling Amice over Tippet by high church people.
- The Provost was dismayed at the end of the mass to have it pointed out to him that the mass may not have been valid as he was wearing his stole in the manner of a priest rather than in the manner of a deacon.
- The Provost then used the fact that his stole was the wrong way round to justify the fact that he had forgotten to follow the gospel procession earlier in the service.
- Black shoes were worn throughout.

8 responses to “Mitre over the parapet moments”

Kimberly

11/04/2008

Thanks for linking +David’s post. I’d read it, and the first few comments, but missed that later discussion. It represents a new level of blog dialogue in the SEC, I think.

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Rev Ruth

12/04/2008

Who’ll be next, do you think?

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Anonymous

12/04/2008

Thanks for the episcopal summary – I take back my previous criticisms about the bishops. They are being rather splendidly thoughtful at the moment. As was Archbish Sentamu on Radio 4’s question time 🙂

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bishop david

12/04/2008

Kelvin – thanks for your linking and attention-drawing activities. It’s hard not to be aware that there is a common thread linking all of those ‘over the parapet’ contributions – which is that the tone of recent contributions from our Catholic colleagues has been unfortunate. But now that we seem to have some momentum, I hope we can move on to be a bit more successful at shaping an agenda rather than simply responding to others.

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Duncan

14/04/2008

What’s the clergy equivalent of a mitre over the parapet?

A biretta over the altar?

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Stewart

14/04/2008

…only when it is snowing!!

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kelvin

15/04/2008

I can see snow on Cruachan. Birettas may be worn.

(See number 79 of my 100 things if you’ve no idea what Stewart is alluding to).

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Phil

21/04/2008

I am afraid the discussion with +David on his blog came to a sad end….have another look!

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