What is in Kelvin's Head?

The Beatitudes of Livestreaming

13/09/2024

Blessed are they who livestream their church services
for the Kingdom of Heaven is theirs to share with others and they know it.

Blessed are the sick and the dying in churches which livestream
for they shall be comforted by still being able to be part of their congregations
in addition to receiving the personal and pastoral care of their friends and clergy.

Blessed are those who are meek enough to know that audio matters more than video
for they will inherit the online audience.

Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for life-changing worship both online and in-person
for their love of God will be counted as righteousness.

Blessed are the joyful
for their joy online will light up the world.

Blessed are the purposeful
for they will make their livestreaming easy to find and they will ensure that
no-one needs to download a hymnsheet, a liturgy book and a pdf version of the notices.

Blessed are the livestream makers
for they are counted amongst the evangelists of today.

Blessed are the congregations who rejoice in the technical and digital skills of those who are often overlooked
for they shall reap a harvest of plenty.

Blessed are those who know that their worship would be better not livestreamed yet
for they know that they need to concentrate on renewing their in-person worship first.

Blessed are you when people make snarky comments about your livestream
for they are telling you they want it to be better for the honour and the glory of the Lord our God.

beatitudes, churches, livestream, online worship

6 responses to “Tales of the City”

Kimberly

19/06/2007

Your move next, then.

Can I suggest a bottle of spirit vinegar in one hand and a bottle of wine in the other? He should soon realize that the windows are not nearly as discerning as his neighbor.

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Rev Ruth

20/06/2007

I reckon he’s been watching too much Kim & Aggie. You watch, he’ll be back for lemon juice next. Altho Lord knows what he’ll be wearing if that’s what he wears for cleaning windows.

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kelvin

20/06/2007

Fortunately, I’ve plenty of lemon juice to offer him if he comes back. Though if he had been watching Kim and Aggie, would he not have been attired in rubber gloves with feather trim? Did he remove them before coming upstairs? (If so, he should not have bothered).

When I think about it, the fact that I live in the land of 24 hour vinegar emporia makes this little episode all the more strange.

The presumption of commenters above is that this is the start of something. I had thought myself that this was a relationship that had been formed, blossomed and was completed within the space of the dialogue reported, but perhaps I am wrong.

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Roddy

20/06/2007

You know you’re in the West End of Glasgow when the residents clean their windows with wine vinegar…

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kelvin

20/06/2007

Thanks for the social commentary Roddy. Perhaps I should have offered him balsamic. I never thought at the time.

There have been soap-operas and novels made out of less promising material than this.

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Anonymous

21/06/2007

this is so much better than the nescafe gold blend ads. looking forward to the next episode!

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