• David’s Lamentation – a sermon preached on 12 August 2024

    David the King, was grieved and moved
    He went to his chamber,
    his chamber and wept
    And as he wept, he wept and said…

    Oh, my son, oh, my son
    Would to God I had died
    Would to God I had died
    Would to God I had died
    For thee, oh Absalom, my son, my son

    Victory that day was turned into mourning
    When the people did see
    how the king grieved for his son
    He covered his face and in a loud voice cried…

    Did you ever meet someone who was better at something that you are and admire them just for that?

    Meet David King of Israel who is better at doing something than I am and I love him for it.

    We’ve been reading stories of David for the last couple of weeks and seen much that is unlovable. Much that we would turn our eyes from.

    Two weeks ago, we heard of him sending a man to certain death in battle so that he could make off with his wife.

    David’s behaviour in that reading is so outrageous that I had complaints from members of this congregation for allowing it to be read.

    I tend not to believe in providence but I do believe in comeuppance and last week we saw David being confronted with righteous anger by Nathan the Prophet pointing the finger at David for his wicked behaviour. And turning David into a snivelling wreck.

    David often isn’t a terribly attractive figure.

    And yet he can do something that makes me admire him 3000 years since he last drew breath.

    David could lament like no-one else. His cries of lament over Saul his mentor and David is lover and Absolom his son move me. Move me very deeply and make me love him despite all else we know of him.

    The version of David’s Lamentation that I just sang is just one of many settings of his words thoughout the ages. His sorrow is written in the history books of the scriptures and recorded in the Book of Psalms, the hymn book that Jesus sang from.

    And lament is important.

    It is sometimes said that we have forgotten how to lament. Maybe we have forgotten how to lament in public, but I know that this congregation is one where lament is seldom absent in private.

    Lament for the horror of wee girls killed at a dance class.

    Lament for the horror of fascists turning that into something to attack those who have come to this country seeing refuge and safety.

    Lament for those the stirring up of race riots online.

    And Lament for schools hit by missiles in Gaza.

    And people who are members of this country express lamentation for events that go back months and years as well as weeks.

    Lamenting over the Russian invasion of Ukraine.

    Lamenting for the national boundaries that Britain left behind in Africa.

    Lamenting for a world being roasted by the sins of climate change denial and ignorance.

    And lament for ourselves and our own sins.

    For we like David have done things which we ought not to have done and no done things that we ought. And there is no help in us.

    And lament for our griefs for all of us bear them.

    David puts into verse his grief, He lets his troubled soul sing.

    And it makes me love him.

    It makes me love him because lamentation is the expression of the depth of our capacity to love. For grief is the name for love that is stronger than death.

    Lament is the song of the hopeless and the despairing. But it is an urge to give voice to the deep, deep knowledge that things should not be this way. Paradoxically it contains within it hope. Hope that it will not always feel like this.

    Deep in the pit, lament shines a little light on sadness and from that light, please God may seeds of hope be nourished. That knowledge that things should not be this way is the beginning, the fragile and tender beginning of doing something with the recognition that not only will all things pass but that all this could be different, better.

    The hope that justice may be known.

    The hope that righteousness may flourish.

    The hope that peace will prevail.

    The hope that the rawness of grief might change.

    These are the seeds nourished by lamentation.

    Christianity never denies death or grief or tragedy. Indeed, it says that all of these are all too real.

    However, it says that they will not win in the end. It says that resurrection isn’t just possible but inevitable. And it says that a world put right is not just something we are called to make real but that we are called to enjoy and delight in it forever.

    “Love wins” isn’t just a slogan that some of us carry about in rainbow colours at Pride. It is also the truth that those of us who bear the name Christian live by. It is our two word creed.

    In the gospel reading this morning, Jesus talks about eternal life being our destiny. I am the bread of life he says. And whoever eats of me will have eternal life.

    We eat of him week by week and are nourished by the comforts of the Eucharist at this table. And as we receive the bread each week we receive the challenge to make the world one in which everyone has enough to eat, people to love them and joy in great abundance.

    I believe that lamentation is important and needs to be part of our song. But I also believe that lament will not be the last song that we sing.

    There are alleluias to be had in putting the world to rights. There are hosannas to be sung in worship in sharing the business of a God who wills goodness and love for everyone who draws breath.

    I am aware of the deep despair that people have been feeling about the world recently.

    Lament and do it well. But lament and live.

    In this place, every week, before we eat of the bread of life, we hear the bidding, “Lift up your hearts!”

    As we hear that this week, let us hear it as a command.

    For God is good. And goodness will prevail. And love wins.

    Always and forever, love wins.

    In the name of the Father and of the Son and of the holy Spirit. Amen.

     

7 responses to “Gender Segregation in Universities and Elsewhere”

  1. Nick Brindley Avatar

    The issue that Universities UK was advising on wasn’t single sex meetings but segregated seating, which is significantly different. They were talking neither about organisations nor meetings that were closed to members of either sex but of segregation by sex within a single meeting open, on that basis, to all.

    This isn’t to say that it isn’t important to think about the issues you raise, just that they are substantially and importantly different from the issues raised by the UUK advice, which in turn are different (as UUK say in this response http://blog.universitiesuk.ac.uk/2013/11/25/external-speakers-guidance-segregation/) from those raised in the subsequent debate)

    1. Kelvin Avatar

      I also remember about 15 years ago welcoming a straight couple into an Anglican congregation who told me that they had never sat together in church before, it being the custom where they came from in rural Wales for men and women to sit on opposite sides of the aisle in church.

      They also told me that it was the custom to put up on a board what everone had given the previous week.

  2. Kelvin Avatar

    Thanks Nick – I wasn’t aware that this was what had caused it. I don’t think my comments are irrelevant to that situation and some of the discussion I heard on Today was broader than simply over seating.

    I am reminded of the performances of (I think) Oleana by David Mamet in which the audience was seated in gender segregated seating. It was an interesting experiment and one that made many uncomfortable.

    I struggle to think of any situation where I would support gender segregated seating on the basis of the preference of the speaker.

  3. RevRuth Avatar

    In Homerton Hospital 10 years ago they had invested big bucks in a stunning multi-faith chaplaincy centre. Women Muslim patients still said their prayers in the stairwell.

    I say No to segregation.

  4. Nick Brindley Avatar

    I certainly wouldn’t want to (try to) introduce segregated seating into my churches but that’s a slightly different question from telling others they’re not allowed to segregate, which is what’s in question in this case. The advice from UUK was that Universities should tolerate meetings being held in their premises where seating was segregated. The advice was not aimed at anyone who wanted to segregate but at the owners of buildings such people might want to use. From the point of view of the Church we’re more likely, I would think, to be in the position of the University than that of the meeting organisers, since segregated seating is more or less unknown in contemporary British Christian settings (as far as I know).

    1. Kelvin Avatar

      I’ve only encountered segregated seating in Coptic churches and in Synagogues.

      As I said above, I have met people who have lived their lives in the UK in a church which did practise segregated seating.

  5. Duncan Avatar
    Duncan

    Good points, well made.

    The thing that does disturb me a little in this debate (refreshingly absent from your piece) is the shrillness of the liberal voices I have heard (particularly on Radio 4) about that fact that, on occasion, consenting adults might want to sit in separate groups.

    Listening to them, it was as if one of the 10 commandments had been broken. (“Thou shalt not sit in a group comprised only of members of the same sex where there exists a group of the opposite sex in close proximity.”)

    IF there is no coercion, overt or implicit, then surely people are free to sit ‘where the heck they like’ (to quote the University spokesperson speaking on this issue.)

    What it did raise for me, however, is the fact that coercion is rarely absent from group gatherings of any sort – where the pressure to conform can be strong. And churches are as ‘bad’ at this as any other group. Group norms – whether voiced by the shrill cry of left-leaning liberals, or conservative Imams, or vicars on Sunday – are stubborn and powerful little blighters. I’m not sure that legislating them in – or out – really works.

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