• Trolleys are for Supermarkets

    I had a lovely morning today conducting a funeral service. Oh, I know lots of people don’t get that this can be satisfying but to me I can’t really think of a more lovely way of spending a morning than committing someone who has died at a great age into the love of God. The fact that the person who had died had in large part lived to make the world more beautiful only made it more lovely.

    I was struck by a brief conversation with the undertaker before the service went in. This wasn’t a busy funeral – the person who had died had outlived most of those who might once have come to celebrate her life. As the coffin was being taken out of the hearse, I was surprised to see three members of the undertaker’s staff join him in lifting the coffin onto their shoulders.

    “Oh, you don’t use a trolley?” I asked in surprise.

    The answer that I got was wonderful –

    “No, Mr Holdsworth, trolleys are for supermarkets, we always carry the coffin in”.

    I cannot tell you how pleased I was to hear this.

    So many funerals seem to involve a squeaky and undignified trolley. I even have to insist sometimes that the coffin is lifted onto proper tressels during the funeral itself. There’s many a person in the funeral business who would leave a coffin on the trolley throughout.

    Am I alone in thinking that there’s not much dignity in a coffin on wheels?

    I know there will be exceptions where a trolley is necessary and I guess that, in an industry that has seen costs soaring, it is going to cost more if one has to pay the pallbearers but I do prefer a coffin to be carried into church rather than pushed.

    At some crematoria where I’ve officiated the presumption is so much in favour of wheels that a kind of roll-on, roll-off trolley has become an integral part of the proceedings.

    We don’t talk that much about death, though there are some valiant attempts to get us to do so. There’s the death café movement that gathers people to talk about death and I seem to remember an initiative in the Church of England called Grave Talk which was an attempt to build up a conversation.

    I know that any undertakers will arrange for pallbearers to carry a coffin in properly if you ask them. That’s what undertakers do – they undertake to make the arrangements for you. I’m someone who mourns the transformation of undertakers into “funeral directors” – the very term seems to imply that the business knows better than either the celebrant who has probably got a bit of experience on how to do things properly, the relatives (who may, if they are feeling particular grief may well feel better for being involved in the funeral planning and service) and indeed the wishes of the person who has died if they did  the sensible thing and left instructions.

    The joy today was finding a company which just don’t normally use a trolley as policy. It is a small thing but an important one.

    Funeral trolleys always remind me of the wobbly nave altar in St Ninian’s Cathedral in Perth, which itself always looked as though it had been purloined from a hospital porter.

    Now where did undertakers’ trolleys come from? And why do people put up with them?

    They are hideous. Always hideous.

    No. No. Away ye trolley-bearers.

    And congratulations to Sim and Son for their trolley-free policy.

    (I’m happy to link to any other undertakers in the West of Scotland who never use a trolley)

5 responses to “Sermon preached on 8 January 2012”

  1. […] on Sunday, Fr Chucks celebrated his first Holy Communion and Evensong as a Priest. Provost Kelvin preached a delightfully personal sermon addressed to Chucks in which he drew some parallels between the season of Epiphany and […]

  2. DementedBonxie Avatar
    DementedBonxie

    It’s not really so hard to pronounce Chukwuemeka. Divide it into 2 parts: Chukwu / emeka
    You can surely manage ‘chook – woo’
    and ‘ay – may – kah’ (maybe the ‘ay’ should be ‘eh’ ?) Stress on ‘may’ I think.

    Even doing him the honour of saying one or other half of his name would be something! I believe its meaning is ‘God has done something great’ . Chucks seems somewhat undignified by comparison. So we might at least do something decent and make our muscles work a little differently.

    But then, I’m an enthusiast for the idea that the learning to use muscles differently is an important part of a process of getting to appreciate another person & culture.

    All that aside, a fine sermon, thanks.

    1. kelvin Avatar

      Thanks DementedBonxie

      I don’t really have trouble with his name – I’ve got used to baptising lots of babies with Igbo names in recent years.

      Chucks is the name that he is happy to go by amongst both Igbo and English speakers.

      We did decide the other night that Bishop Gregor did need to use Chukwuemeka in full at the ordination.

  3. Jaye Avatar

    I found both Friday and Sunday very emotional. Occasions like these days affirm my own belief in God. It was wonderful to see Chuks ordained by the Bishop but the huge hug you gave Chuks and your smile as you were doing it said it all for me 🙂 He’s a treasure, and such an amazing addition to our clergy team-truly a God-given gift to us. It just speaks volumes for inclusion, diversity, tolerance, and all those other qualities I feel are so lacking in other denominations ( including the one from which I come).
    I thought your sermon was wonderfully moving and I don’t mind admit to shedding tears as you spoke, and as Fr Chuks gave the blessing at the conclusion of the service, and at Evensong too, but I’m like that over things I really care about in this world.

    I know it’s been a journey requiring patience, application, and negotiation. Thank you Kelvin for your part in making this wonderful thing come to pass.

  4. Kimberly Avatar

    The middle part of the sermon was dedicated, I presume, to Tilly, of blessed memory.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Previous Posts

  • Should churches use e-mail? Or indeed blogging?

    Yesterday’s post about the internet and what we can learn from the demise of HMV didn’t raise that many comments but it certainly did the rounds, being more shared on Facebook than anything that I’ve written in months. It was picked up as a conversation topic by the Anglican Church of Canada’s The Conversation too.…

  • 8 Things the Churches Could Learn From the collapse of HMV

    I’m sad to see that the HMV music chain is in trouble. The sadness that I feel about it though has to be accompanied with a knowledge that I’ve looked elsewhere for my entertainment recently. At one time I would have gone there to buy things for others and things for myself around Christmas. This…

  • Sermon preached for St Mungo – 13 January 2013

    I have to confess that for most of my life I did not give St Mungo much of passing thought. I certainly encountered him when I was in primary school up the road in that I remember a wonderful Primary 5 teacher in Bearsden making us do a project on the great urban conurbation that…

  • Sermon preached for the Epiphany 2013

    Here’s the sermon I preached for the Epiphany. My day was made when a member of the congregation came up to me at the end beaming. He introduced himself to me as a member of the Iranian Community of Glasgow and said: “We, we Iranians were the first to worship the Baby Jesus!” And they…