• Review of Last Year’s Predictions

    Well, clearly it behoves me to consider last year’s New Year Predictions and see how I did.

    Remember those people who used to say, “But what is a blog…?” Well this year you are going to be hearing them say, “But what is a mooc…?”

    Well, I think I got that partially right. Lots of people have been getting online education and training from moocs and mooclike environments. Coming to a church context near you in the future. I claim a partial hit with this prediction.

    Gay men are going to start shaving again. Now that so many straight men have bought into the idea that beards are hip, it is time to mess with their fashion sense again. Consider this the memo. (Next year, the end of tattoos!)

    Oh, I got this so, so wrong and beards have become so, so absurd. How long, O Lord, how long?

    Church of Scotland General Assembly will be unable to affirm last year’s compromise on a local option for ministers who happen to be gay.

    Well, I got this one wrong too. Looks as though the Assembly will affirm last year’s compromise though there is disagreement about whether the provisions regarding civil partnership should also refer to marriage. I expect this one will run on for a bit.

    More revelations relating to Cardinal Keith Patrick O’Brien.

    Yes – we have revelations about where he is living and how he is funded. I expected more about his time as bishop, but that may come yet.

    Number of active bloggers decreases. Influence of those still blogging increases.

    Yes – blogging has become much more intentional and is clearly for the committed. However, I’m pleased to see an end of year boost in Scottish Episcopal blogging once people realised they had something they passionately wanted to talk about.

    The real purpose of the Pilling Report will be revealed with hindsight as evangelicals begin to argue about its contents. (May take a couple of years, but trust me on this one). Initially this will be in private – increasingly in public. Having been the great unifying factor for Evangelicals for the last 10 years, attitudes to gay people will become the source of greatest disunity amongst Evangelicals for the next decade. Unappealing and unsatisfying as it is, Pilling is a watershed – it was never designed to court liberal opinion so we might as well stop moaning about it. It was designed to divide evangelical opinion and is going to be jolly successful.

    Not Proven must be the verdict on this one for the year that is past – partly true but the bit about Pilling remains to be seen as I expected. We’ve have some interesting debates within Evangelicalism and Vicky Beeching’s coming out. This one really will run and run.

    The Independence Referendum will be lost here in Scotland but alas, not by enough to shut everyone up.

    Yes – bang on. I was right. I was right. I was right.

    Such terrible statistics in the Diocese of Glasgow and Galloway that we lose at least 4 seats on General Synod.

    Yes – did we lose 6 or was it more?

    Lord Carey will say that Christians are being persecuted in the UK, that the church is dying out or that the sky is going to fall in, and will say it at the most unhelpful time possible – probably around one of the English General Synods or Easter.

    I’m claiming this is a hit. He came out in favour of allowing assisted suicide (against the Church of England’s stated policy) on 11 July 2014. Synod started 11 July 2014.

    We will hear about our first UK gay divorce.

    No – surprisingly, I don’t think I can find headlines about this.

    Trends to watch:

    Continued meltdown of the Church of Scotland. Ceasing to be a national church before our very eyes.

    Internet increasingly rewards those who know how to manipulate images.

    Economic polarization of the UK continues.

    Yes. Yes. And, sadly, Yes.

    Mixed bag this year.

11 responses to “Evensong (with Dragons)”

  1. Cal Avatar
    Cal

    I always remember being told that the final “smoke” in the Stainer is meant to be the loudest note in Anglican choral music. I have no idea how that can possibly be qualified, and of course there are so many variables, but I still like to believe it’s true.

    1. kelvin Avatar

      Thanks Duncan – http://www.kjv-only.com/unicorn.html has a list of them for those interested.

      Cal – was thinking about you just the other day. I bet you’d know how to do deploy glitter canons for Corpus Christi.

  2. duncan Avatar
    duncan

    I love the fact that the unicorn appears in the KJV bible about ten times. Who said scripture doesn’t contain mythic elements!

  3. Cal Avatar
    Cal

    Fluttter ‘fetti has long been overlooked in the liturgy, I feel. I suspect you’d have to bribe your servers to sweep it up though – least favourite job.

  4. Martin Ritchie Avatar
    Martin Ritchie

    The loudness of “smoke” probably depends on the choir singing it! I bet St Mary’s give it a good thump! 😉

    On the subject of dragons…….we have some stylised ones hidden away in our Daniel Cottier stained glass at Pilrig St Paul’s in Edinburgh. I didn’t notice them for over three years despite having spent ages taking photographs of the windows. Cunningly hidden as I’m sure all dragons are!

    1. kelvin Avatar

      The smoke was certainly wonderfully loud last night.

      I see that Freda has new dragons, though they don’t seem particularly well hidden.

      Cal – I hope very much that the skills that you are currently building up are at some time and in some place offered unto the Lord in the facilitation of the most holy, most glorious and most magnificent liturgy.

      [Lesson learned from typing this comment – do not muddle up dragons and dragoons]

  5. Brother David Avatar
    Brother David

    [May] the Holy and Blessed Trinity to protect us from religion that is dull or humorless.

    AMEN!

  6. Rosemary Hannah Avatar
    Rosemary Hannah

    Now Kelvin, you must have read my story of St Michael, and you know, perfectly well, that actually the great archangel is dragon-formed. THe horrid prodder with the lance is actually Lucifer.

  7. ryan Avatar
    ryan

    Sounds fabulous. Impressed that you weren’t tempted to rename it EvenDrag!

  8. Agatha Avatar
    Agatha

    What if your Dyson isn’t in D? Mine is probably more A below middle C.

    I also like the idea of you all singing (a la The Clash) “I saw the Lord and the Lord won”.

  9. PamB Avatar
    PamB

    @Cal – I heard that too, but got pooh-poohed when I remarked upon it. Glad to hear I’m not alone.
    @Martin – St Mary’s choir do not thump. Lean upon, emphasise, give weight to, but never thump. Nor, for the psalmody aficionados out there, do they gabble.

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