• In praise of Easyjet staff on a very bad flight home

    I know it isn’t often that you read something in praise of an airline after a particularly difficult journey. However, yesterday I thought that Easyjet did pretty well with a horribly fraught journey from Alicante to Glasgow.

    I was travelling back from a retreat at a Jesuit retreat house in Spain which I try to go on every second year. It should have been a straightforward trip – an hour by car to the airport, hanging about for the usual check-in stuff and then a three hour flight to Glasgow.

    What happened was this…

    Firstly it became apparent that because of a dispute by the French Air Traffic Control people (who are deeply wicked and naughty) things were not going to go terribly smoothly. The flight was initially shown as being delayed for an hour but it was a full hour and a half after the normal boarding time that we were able to get on the plane. We were then told that we would be held on the tarmac until there was permission from France to fly. This was something of a surprise as we had believed we were on our way. Expected delay was 2 hours. However after 2 hours nothing had happened in a hot, sticky and very cramped way and the captain appeared in the cabin to announce that unless we got going smartish he wasn’t going to be able to fly us to Glasgow anyway as he didn’t have enough working flying hours in the day to take us there.

    During this time, most of the passengers were grumpy but content that all was being done for them that could be done. All except one, who had an outburst at the flight crew saying that he was being messed about and blaming them for what was going on. Clearly, the staff wanted to get home as much as the rest of us.

    Anyway, the prospect was opening up before us of having to get off the plane and spend a night in some hotel in Alicante (or Benidorm?) before coming back the next day early to fly. This was not an entertaining idea. Fortunately though another plan was devised. We would take off and whilst in the air, Easyjet would arrange for us to land somewhere or other (Luton? Gatwick?) where a new pilot and crew would join us and fly us on up to Glasgow.

    This was met with a round of applause by the passengers who clearly didn’t want another night in Spain.

    So, off we went and all was well (though significantly delayed) until we landed at Luton for a change of drivers. The crew distributed what food was on board. (I think the failure to take more food on board a flight that was clearly headed for long delays is the only real error I can see in the whole proceedings). I ended up eating a pot meal of cous-cous and lentils which tasted as bad as it sounds.

    Anyway, we got to Luton and were told that the new crew were walking towards the aircraft ready to take us on to Glasgow. The retiring captain got a cheer for his efforts so far and disappeared.

    Then Mr Angry Passenger decided to grab his hand luggage and make a run for it, fighting his way through the people stretching their legs and heading for the open door and steps which had been put next to the plane.

    Now, getting off a plane without permission and wandering around an airport is a bad idea. So, one of the cabin crew tried to head him off, telling him he would be arrested if he stepped onto the tarmac before making a call for police and security to attend the plane.

    The result of this was Mr Angry halfway down the steps shouting, Mrs Angry and one of their unfortunate children at the top of the steps and two further children at the top of the steps at the other end of the plane. Meanwhile, we had crew at the top of the steps trying to remonstrate with Mr A and get him back on board along with pilots and security people at the bottom of the steps trying to sort it out.

    It was clear that the plane wasn’t going anywhere soon – although the rest of the passengers were in no danger, we had effectively been hijacked.

    Now, this being a Glasgow flight, of course, we all believed we were all involved and that his business was our business. Several burly passengers were offering to go down the steps and get Mr A back onto the plane forcibly whilst several others were of the view that their muscle might be helpful in making sure that he never got on the plane again.

    This phase of the journey was concluded when Mr Angry was joined by Mrs Angry and the poor Junior Angrys and led away. (Personally, I hope he was arrested and that Easyjet try to recover the costs of all this from him).

    In all of all that was happening, the Easyjet staff behaved brilliantly, chatting with passengers and doing all possible to calm down what had become rather tricky and with the potential to get worse.

    Sadly, the departure of the five recalcitrant passengers did not end our troubles. Security proceedures meant that their hold baggage had to be removed from the plane. Furthermore, we then discovered that it also meant all the luggage had to be removed from the plane and remanifested. So, ground crew had to be procured to remove all our luggage for checking. Not only that, but the cabin crew had to go through all the cabin lockers removing everything in them and asking passengers to identify what was theirs.

    Eventually, we had accounted for everything and got under way with the new crew (who had believed they were going to Palma last night) expertly getting us to Glasgow where we landed at 2230. The flight should have arrived at 1610 – so it was 5 hours and 20 mins late. I’d spent 8 and a half hours in the cabin and I’ve never been more pleased to see the lights of Glasgow airport. Total journey time door to door was 13 hours.

    And despite that, I couldn’t praise the crew more highly. They dealt with everything brilliantly, professionally and calmly. Full marks to Easyjet.

    In other news, I had a fantastic retreat.

5 responses to “Sermon preached on 14 March 2010”

  1. David | Dah•veed Avatar
    David | Dah•veed

    It is always interesting to me to travel the world from the comfort of my home on Sundays and get a feel for how different of our honored clergy approach a shared topic as we have the same readings in our Anglican worship. (Not forgetting that other flavors of Christians are also using those same readings as well.)

    Father Tobias Haller has a much different angle to this story in the form of poetry on his blog; The Elder Son and the Father’s Repentance

    Regarding Bishop David as you current ordinary, is that a canonical device of SEC, it seems different from how it is handled in TEC and so here in Mexico. When there is no diocesan bishop the Diocesan Standing Committee is then the ecclesiastical authority in a diocese and they can choose to “hire” a bishop for episcopal functions in the interim period until a new diocesan is elected and enthroned. The hired gun is often a neighboring diocesan, a resident or neighboring suffragan or assistant or they may even pull someone from retirement for a short period.

    I was happy, that as with you Father Kelvin, I had no trouble at all understanding +David’s accent! I see also that you have managed to repair that lean to your pulpit.

    When +David defined prodigal as extravagant waste I was immediately reminded of the writings of one of my favorite bishops, the blessed +John Shelby Spong at whose feet I studies one summer at Vancouver School of Theology. He often states, “God, who is the Source of Love, calls us to love wastefully.” God’s love for us is in the measure of extravagant waste and God calls us to love one another just as wastefully. As did the father in the parable.

    I cannot recall who of the Master Painters, but I know of a painting of the return of this Prodigal Son where the haste with which the father rushed to greet his son is represented in the fact that he is out in the road hugging his son in his fine clothes, but he is wearing mismatched shoes. I have experienced just such love and concern from my own Papá as I have seen him responding to emergencies in the middle of the night in our wee village and glancing down to see that he is wearing one shoe and a bedroom slipper!

    Pardon my rambles today, this simple sermon sparked many thoughts.

    1. kelvin Avatar

      During an Episcopal Vacancy, it seems to be becoming common for someone to be appointed to be Bishops’ Commissary for the vacancy. This gives them delegated authority for administrative functions. The Ordinary, in such circumstances is usually the Primus though I think that the Priumus (or perhaps the Episcopal Synod) can nominate someone else to look after an Episcopal Vacancy.

  2. ryan Avatar

    Ooh, what’s a Priumus? (and yes, I googled – unsuccessfully – before asking!)

  3. David | Dah•veed Avatar
    David | Dah•veed

    A Priumus is a typo. Nothing more.

  4. ryan Avatar

    Thanks! I did (genuinely) wonder if it was something different (like a collegiate group who make primus-like decisions in an empty see?) because of the “Primus though I think that the primus” (as opposed to Primus/s/he phrasing). Feel a bit D’Oh now.

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