• Teaching sermon on Confession and Absolution

    During Lent, I’m preaching giving simple teaching addresses focussing on different things that we do during the Eucharist.

    In the name of God, Father, Son and Holy Spirit. Amen.

    I don’t know whether you’ve given something up for Lent.

    These days I often tend to think of taking something up for Lent rather than giving up a bad habit.

    I remember in one of the churches that I used to work there was a wonderful woman who came to the midweek service. She came from a very churchy family – the sister of a priest, was married to a priest and was a powerful church woman herself.

    And she used to come along to worship at the midweek service that I usually took. We met in that church on Wednesdays and so the midweek service always carried on with the same congregation plus a few more on Ash Wednesday.

    And the thing I remember about her today is an Ash Wednesday when there was a lot of chatter over the post service coffee about what they were all giving up for Lent – it certainly wasn’t biscuits.

    And someone said, “What are you giving up for Lent Margaret”.

    And she looked them straight in the eye and said, “I’m giving up what I usually give up”.

    “What’s that they all chorused”.

    And she waited just long enough to get the attention of the entire room and said, “Bad thoughts”

    I thought it was the perfect answer. If only it was easier to do.

    But easy isn’t what Lent is necessarily about.

    The hardest Lenten discipline that I ever undertook was the first one I undertook when I joined the Episcopal Church.

    I grew up in the Salvation Army where we didn’t have Lent though we did dedicate February to something similar called Self Denial.

    We also didn’t have any alcohol or intoxicants.

    Which is how I managed to make it to being a postgrad student in my mid twenties who had never had a drop to drink.

    I recognise that it is more normal to give up alcohol for Lent.

    However, I did join the Scottish Episcopal Church in my second year as a theology student and may well have been the first student in Christendom ever to give up being teetotal for Lent.

    I’m not sure that I have much wisdom to offer from that time other than that whisky and cider don’t mix nicely.

    And to be honest, although I’ll occasionally have a drink now, it is a very rare one.

    But all of this is a long-winded way of getting me to what I’ve given up for Lent this year.

    Well, I’ve given up preaching on the bible readings for Lent this year.

    And am going to preach a series of teaching sermons for Lent this year and instead of focusing on the bible readings, I’m going to let them speak for themselves.

    I’m going to preach us through the Eucharist for the next few weeks.

    Stopping at a different key point in the order of service each week to give us pause to think about what’s going on.

    This week I’ve stopped us at the Confession and Absolution. Just to rest a moment and think about what we’re doing when we say these words.

    It is important because I think that if we become Eucharistic people and put ourselves in the way of the liturgy, it will resonate around inside us and reappear in our consciousness when we need it, not just when we’re in church.

    The words that we say each week make and remake us. They shape us. They take their part in building us into being the people that God wants us to become.

    God is love and we are his children. There is no room for fear in love. We love because he loved us first.

    May those words come back to you when you need them.

    There is no room for fear in love.

    Countless times in scripture we  encounter people being afraid. From the shepherds on the hillside at Christmas to the disciples startled by the risen Christ, the message from on high is “Do not be afraid”.

    We remind ourselves of that before the confession because the confession is part of making us able to live without fear.

    God our Father, we confess to you and to our fellow members in the Body of Christ that we have sinned in thought, word and deed, and in what we have failed to do.

    What we acknowledge when we confess is a bit like what most people acknowledge when they think about the world today or read the papers. Things are not the way they should be.

    In the confession, we acknowledge our part in it.

    And we do the thing needed to sort it out.

    We are truly sorry. Forgive us our sins, and deliver us from the power of evil, for the sake of your Son who died for us, Jesus Christ, our Lord.

    Now, confession relates to two aspects of life when we’re not together.

    Firstly, confession together in church is part of what shapes us into being people who will own up when we get things wrong in our lives when we are not in church.

    That how the liturgy in church is supposed to affect you.

    It shapes you and makes you different.

    That should be the consequence of coming here. And for goodness sake, if the liturgy here doesn’t do that, go and find somewhere where it does.

    Secondly, remember that our church also offers the chance to engage in the sacrament of confession privately with a priest.

    I have received the sacrament both as a penitent and a confessor and I would describe both as being a gift and a place where God does business with us.

    The rule in our church about private confession is very clear – all may, some should, none must.

    It is simply available and something which every priest in the church has to offer to everyone or point the person towards another priest who can hear their confession.

    That is available in this church and the clergy are happen to be approached about it at any time. Lent being a particularly good time.

    I was involved in a trial recently and one of the most important bits of it was when the sherrif said, “I have heard the crown witnesses and they have been both credible and reliable”.

    I already knew I was telling the truth.

    But it was something else to hear someone say they believed me.

    Confession is about telling the truth to God. Knowing who we really are in the world and facing up to the stuff we would rather not face.

    And  the promise is the same.

    If we do so. We will be forgiven.

    For God, who is both power and love, will forgive us and will free us from our sins,

    Will heal and strengthen us by his Spirit, and will raise us to new life in Christ our Lord.

    In the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit.
    Amen.

9 responses to “The Episcopal Way of Death”

  1. Rosemary Hannah Avatar
    Rosemary Hannah

    The greatest privilege I have ever had in the service of the people of the church was to be the person who received the coffin the night before the funeral and led Compline then. The church was on an island, and the coffins those of people I loved and honoured. It was deeply moving for everybody there. I hope one day that will be done for me and mine.

  2. Sr Alison Joy Avatar
    Sr Alison Joy

    I have prayed washed and dressed Sisters who have died and it helped me to see that death is not scary. I have lined a number of Sisters graves with flowers around the inner edge from the inside, also helpful. The body was received at Vespers in Chapel the day before, Solemn Requiem was the next day complete with asperges and incense. We returned from the graveside and when in Chapel sung a very joyful favorite hymn for the Sister we had just buried. It was always a sad, happy, remembering occasion I hope that I will be able to have most of this too.

  3. Sarah Lawton Avatar
    Sarah Lawton

    This is beautifully said.

    When my parents died in a car crash, we knew our Episcopal church would be too small to accommodate all the mourners; but the local Roman Catholic congregation saw our need and graciously offered the use of their space for our Episcopal funeral (including Eucharist led by two Episcopal bishops). They also offered their pall for the second coffin as we had only one. All the churches and the synagogue in town offered choir members and/or food for the feast after the service. An ecumenical, indeed, interfaith foretaste of heaven!

    We placed the two bodies in closed coffins in our Episcopal church the night before; we prayed Evensong and Compline, and received a long line of visitors; and then parishioners kept vigil with the bodies all night. In the morning we prayed over the bodies before beginning the procession to the larger RC church where the (Episcopal) funeral was to be held. In this sad, glorious service sang many, many Easter hymns, and I learned that it’s possible to sing and sing even through tears. I’m told that people reconciled that day who had not spoken in years – I’ve heard it from both parties (one now a bishop).

    All of which is to say: our Episcopal Way of Death can be a profound grace if we let it. It can be profound too when it’s a simple, small, quiet service for a person who has lived a long life and died of old age (unlike my parents). It’s the same words, the same truth of loss – all of us pass through this life but for a moment – the same mystery, the same words of affirmation and hope at the grave: alleluia, alleluia, alleluia.

    1. Kelvin Avatar

      Thank you for posting that – bearing witness to exactly what I was trying to say.

    2. Michael Povey Avatar
      Michael Povey

      Thanks Sarah. (Other readers, Sarah is a friend. I was at the Funeral and heard her offer the most profound Gospel Centred and Honest Grief eulogy I have ever heard)

      1. Sarah Lawton Avatar
        Sarah Lawton

        Dear Michael, thank you for saying that. Your presence that day was a blessing to our family. That gathering, for all the shock and sadness, really did feel like a foretaste of heaven, didn’t it? A great cloud of witnesses singing with us.

  4. Ronnie Smith Avatar

    Having attended a few funerals in our parish recently – one of them for our Vicar, who died on Easter Eve – and being nearer to the grave myself (at 85 and still active as a priest) I appreciate, Father Kelvin, the care you take over this special subject. The Church can be so close to families at this special time – giving them a taste of ‘The great love of God as revealed in the Son’ – precious at this time.

  5. Tony Whatmough Avatar
    Tony Whatmough

    There are sometimes good reasons for having the cremation first, as there was for my brother yesterday especially with people traveling and wanting to be able to bury the ashes on the same day. They key is to talk with the family about what they are looking for and how it can be done.

    1. Kelvin Avatar

      Dear Tony, I’m sorry to hear that you’ve lost your brother. May be rest in peace and rise in glory.

      There are always reasons why people want to have a cremation first and people always believe that they are good reasons. Every single time there are reasons. My contention is that I’m unpersuaded that any of them justify changing what we believe. (What we do and what we believe being utterly bound up with one another in such circumstances).

      My point about funerals is very precisely that the wishes of the family are important but that no tradition will survive if we simply abandon what we believe for reasons of convenience.

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