What is in Kelvin's Head?

  • Tales of the City – February 2020

    On the way home from the opera I step into a shop to get out of the rain, and buy something to eat against the cold – a late-night post-operatic chittery-bite.

    In front of me are two young men dressed in much less than I am. They are the worse for wear and arguing.

    Drunk Young Man #1: Well we’ll ask someone else then.

    Drunk Young Man #2:     Yes! Someone neutral.

    They turn to me.

    DYM#1: Here man. Settle an arugment for us will you. Is coronavirus real or is it propoganda

    Self: I think it is real.

    DYM#2: Aye man. Told you. It *is* real. He said so. Here, I bet you do a very responsible job

    DYM#1:     Aye very responsible. What are you man?

    I hesitate a moment and consider how to answer.

    DYM#2: I bet he’s a Supply Chain Manager. Are you a Supply Chain Manager, man?

    I smile a smile that I hope will look like the smile of a cold wet Supply Chain Manager.

    DYM#2: I knew it.

    DYM#1: Hey, do you have a lighter?

    I shake my head.

    We are all forlorn that I do not have a lighter.

18 responses to “Biretta Watch – Snowy Day”

  1. Lay clerk Avatar
    Lay clerk

    Hats are old hat. What you really need is a papal ombrellino to keep the snow off! Then you could wear a wooly hat under it which no one would notice because they’d all be so impressed by what you were carrying. Or maybe what the server was carrying for you.

    Reply
  2. kelvin Avatar
    kelvin

    Don’t think for a moment, Lay Clerk, that I have not used such a liturgical essential whilst worshipping the Lord in Scotland.

    I most certainly have, though not to keep the snow off.

    Reply
  3. Lay clerk Avatar
    Lay clerk

    Heaven forfend that I would even consider for a fleeting moment that you had not taken advantage of the full panoply of liturgical sex-aids available!

    Reply
  4. David |Dah • veed| Avatar
    David |Dah • veed|

    I am sure that the proper term Lay Clerk is paraments!

    Reply
  5. Jeff Queen Avatar
    Jeff Queen

    I do like the biretta when traveling…will be wearing one this weekend in the St. Patrick’s day parade. Just a thought, maybe you should change the name of the site to “What’s on Kelvin’s Head.” Just a thought.

    Reply
  6. Paul Avatar
    Paul

    Have been trying desperately to find a Canterbury Cap these last few weeks. Seems no-one makes or sells them anymore!
    A shame, as my former parish was the home of Lancelot Andrewes and they are celebrating his contribution to the translation of the KJB during a Festival Weekend, 24/25 September. I so wanted to wear a hat more in sympathy with the 17th century!
    I shall either default to a skullcap or a biretta, I guess….
    😉

    Reply
  7. Rosemary Hannah Avatar
    Rosemary Hannah

    Some academic head gear (doctoral level) is based on the Canterbury Cap – try academic outfitters.

    Reply
  8. Kennedy Avatar
    Kennedy

    I think I saw +Idris sporting one at the TISEC award ceremony.

    Maybe he’ll know where to get one.

    Reply

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