• In praise of Easyjet staff on a very bad flight home

    I know it isn’t often that you read something in praise of an airline after a particularly difficult journey. However, yesterday I thought that Easyjet did pretty well with a horribly fraught journey from Alicante to Glasgow.

    I was travelling back from a retreat at a Jesuit retreat house in Spain which I try to go on every second year. It should have been a straightforward trip – an hour by car to the airport, hanging about for the usual check-in stuff and then a three hour flight to Glasgow.

    What happened was this…

    Firstly it became apparent that because of a dispute by the French Air Traffic Control people (who are deeply wicked and naughty) things were not going to go terribly smoothly. The flight was initially shown as being delayed for an hour but it was a full hour and a half after the normal boarding time that we were able to get on the plane. We were then told that we would be held on the tarmac until there was permission from France to fly. This was something of a surprise as we had believed we were on our way. Expected delay was 2 hours. However after 2 hours nothing had happened in a hot, sticky and very cramped way and the captain appeared in the cabin to announce that unless we got going smartish he wasn’t going to be able to fly us to Glasgow anyway as he didn’t have enough working flying hours in the day to take us there.

    During this time, most of the passengers were grumpy but content that all was being done for them that could be done. All except one, who had an outburst at the flight crew saying that he was being messed about and blaming them for what was going on. Clearly, the staff wanted to get home as much as the rest of us.

    Anyway, the prospect was opening up before us of having to get off the plane and spend a night in some hotel in Alicante (or Benidorm?) before coming back the next day early to fly. This was not an entertaining idea. Fortunately though another plan was devised. We would take off and whilst in the air, Easyjet would arrange for us to land somewhere or other (Luton? Gatwick?) where a new pilot and crew would join us and fly us on up to Glasgow.

    This was met with a round of applause by the passengers who clearly didn’t want another night in Spain.

    So, off we went and all was well (though significantly delayed) until we landed at Luton for a change of drivers. The crew distributed what food was on board. (I think the failure to take more food on board a flight that was clearly headed for long delays is the only real error I can see in the whole proceedings). I ended up eating a pot meal of cous-cous and lentils which tasted as bad as it sounds.

    Anyway, we got to Luton and were told that the new crew were walking towards the aircraft ready to take us on to Glasgow. The retiring captain got a cheer for his efforts so far and disappeared.

    Then Mr Angry Passenger decided to grab his hand luggage and make a run for it, fighting his way through the people stretching their legs and heading for the open door and steps which had been put next to the plane.

    Now, getting off a plane without permission and wandering around an airport is a bad idea. So, one of the cabin crew tried to head him off, telling him he would be arrested if he stepped onto the tarmac before making a call for police and security to attend the plane.

    The result of this was Mr Angry halfway down the steps shouting, Mrs Angry and one of their unfortunate children at the top of the steps and two further children at the top of the steps at the other end of the plane. Meanwhile, we had crew at the top of the steps trying to remonstrate with Mr A and get him back on board along with pilots and security people at the bottom of the steps trying to sort it out.

    It was clear that the plane wasn’t going anywhere soon – although the rest of the passengers were in no danger, we had effectively been hijacked.

    Now, this being a Glasgow flight, of course, we all believed we were all involved and that his business was our business. Several burly passengers were offering to go down the steps and get Mr A back onto the plane forcibly whilst several others were of the view that their muscle might be helpful in making sure that he never got on the plane again.

    This phase of the journey was concluded when Mr Angry was joined by Mrs Angry and the poor Junior Angrys and led away. (Personally, I hope he was arrested and that Easyjet try to recover the costs of all this from him).

    In all of all that was happening, the Easyjet staff behaved brilliantly, chatting with passengers and doing all possible to calm down what had become rather tricky and with the potential to get worse.

    Sadly, the departure of the five recalcitrant passengers did not end our troubles. Security proceedures meant that their hold baggage had to be removed from the plane. Furthermore, we then discovered that it also meant all the luggage had to be removed from the plane and remanifested. So, ground crew had to be procured to remove all our luggage for checking. Not only that, but the cabin crew had to go through all the cabin lockers removing everything in them and asking passengers to identify what was theirs.

    Eventually, we had accounted for everything and got under way with the new crew (who had believed they were going to Palma last night) expertly getting us to Glasgow where we landed at 2230. The flight should have arrived at 1610 – so it was 5 hours and 20 mins late. I’d spent 8 and a half hours in the cabin and I’ve never been more pleased to see the lights of Glasgow airport. Total journey time door to door was 13 hours.

    And despite that, I couldn’t praise the crew more highly. They dealt with everything brilliantly, professionally and calmly. Full marks to Easyjet.

    In other news, I had a fantastic retreat.

9 responses to “SynodBlogging – 10 Mission and Ministry”

  1. vicky Avatar
    vicky

    Reading this makes for light relief at work. Experiencing it, I suspect, might be like having one’s teeth pulled without anaesthesia.

  2. Shelley Avatar
    Shelley

    I am snugly in my wee office meant to be writing a sermon and thought instead to catch up with the goings on accross the country. I discovered rightly that yours truly would keep me up to date in unique style, so, many thanks for the blogs.

  3. GadgetVicar Avatar
    GadgetVicar

    You’ve done a fantastic job, K. I’ve particularly enjoyed your commentary! I can see you fulfilling the same role at Synod that Terry Wogan does at Eurovision. Well done and thank you!

    I really do think that we need to find somewhere that offers a wireless connection for next year. It’s essential in this day and age that the rest of the church gets good communication on what’s happening at Synod, and not just the potted version that comes out in minutes or ‘Inspires’.

    And you? A ‘fairy’? I’m shocked – I had no idea!

  4. David Campbell Avatar

    Just to totally echo Fr GadgetVicar’s praise Kelvin – a fantastic series of wee reports for those of us not fortunate (?) enough to be there this year. We definitely need more of this kind of thing.

  5. Miriam Avatar
    Miriam

    Have you tried playing the “add the word to the end of the sentence” game yet? This is something which works very well in lectures.

    Pass a piece of paper along the row, each person adds a word to the end of the sentence. It provides intermittent bouts of light relief in dificult situations without compromising your ability to pay attention for the majority of the time. Also. when played discreetly it isn’t obvious to whoever is speaking at the time therefore not causing any offence.

  6. Elizabeth Avatar
    Elizabeth

    So, what is the difference between something passing unanimously or passing nem con?

  7. Kimberly Avatar

    The difference is whose in the chair.

  8. kelvin Avatar
    kelvin

    If something is passed nem con, it means that there is no objection from anyone. (There may be abstentions). If it is passed unanimously, then it means that everyone present votes in favour.

  9. David Avatar
    David

    In refrence to having ones teeth being pulled out, I fear I have to agree. I spend most of that week there soing the sound and AV stuff for synod and the OSCR seminar preceeding it. For a 16 year old it is not a exciting experiance. But I did find out one thing, there is something, there is something more boring then diosician synod.

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