• Divine Dating – the Mysterious Art of Finding A New Cleric

    How does God speak?

    Is it in the words of a CV or by judging the style in which it has been laid out? Would one font convince you to put someone on a shortlist and another make you put the application in the reject pile? Is it through the checking off of tick-boxes on a pre-prepared statement of needs and expectations? Is it likely to be someone who doesn’t surprise you or the person who completely astonishes you? Is it the name murmured on many lips or someone that no-one has ever heard of? Does it come down to the random good (or bad) looks that good (or bad) genes have bestowed? Or are quick judgements made about dress-codes? The colour coding of clerical shirts is one thing, but brown shoes with a black suit… quel horreur!

    Most months I get to take part in conversations at one level or another about church appointments. Mostly that is low level stuff where I’ve not got much input, simply hearing about congregations that are becoming vacant and hearing a little about what they are looking for. And then some time later hearing about whom they have appointed. Sometimes there are surprises. Sometimes there are not. Sometimes there’s no appointment to be made.

    Currently, the congregation that I serve is looking for a new priest to work alongside us and that heightens one’s ponderings about the whole business considerably.

    And of course, just recently, everyone in this diocese has been involved in the business of electing a new bishop. That, somehow, is simultaneously both exactly like the process of finding a new priest and exactly unlike the process of finding a new priest. Looking for a bishop is like looking for a priest but with the process on steroids, ten times the number of people involved and the angst levels rising heavenwards faster than our prayers can keep up.

    There are two things that are clear to me about all of this. The first is that everyone involved seems to believe that God too is deeply involved. The second is that almost no-one would be able to give a coherent explanation of how God gets involved.

    Here in Scotland, when we are looking for a bishop, we expect all the candidates to express the view that God is calling them to the position that is open but we can’t proceed to an election until we’ve got three candidates. Theologically we behave as though we are looking for at least three candidates, one of whom God is genuinely calling to the post of bishop and the rest of whom, God is completely deluding. Having seen the process from just about every perspective possible, I have to say that I’m completely unconvinced that God is in that business.

    As I have listened to all of these processes work themselves out in different dioceses and in different local contexts, I find myself amazed at the sheer variety of reasons that people use to justify the decisions that they make about candidates for different positions.

    Sometimes it does feel as though the mental processes involved in making such decisions seem more similar to the way dating apps are used than anything that could be thought of as the deep work of discernment. Swipe left for unsuitable. untenable and unlikely. Swipe right for God’s anointed one.

    (I’m still talking about finding clerics at the moment, before anyone points out that searching for God’s anointed is unlikely to find me husband material.)

    The truth is though that some of our language about vocations and God’s choices can get in the way. God only ever provided one saviour of the world, after all, and yet many a search committee behaves as though they are still looking for one. We often behave as though we are playing some kind of heavenly inspired dating game.

    People do make judgements about vocational appointments at many different levels. Some of those judgements come from a deep consideration of someone’s gifts and skills. However, that sometimes goes alongside much more superficial decision making. I’ve known people change their mind about a candidate for a position simply on the basis that they’ve been there a long time and they just want it to be over so that they can go home.

    Notwithstanding all this, there may yet be ways of trying to imagine the Holy Spirit being involved within human processes and the fickle changes and chances of human opinion. The main way that I can conceive of God being involved is to think of the many and various ways in which we make up our minds about clerical appointments all sparking off one another. We conceive of the Holy Spirit being a fire, sometimes a blazing fire. When an appointment is made which seems undoubtedly to fall within the boundaries of divine joy then it is easy for me to imagine all those sparks coming together to blaze as some kind of new holy fire which will bring warmth and excitement and life to all who encounter it.

    It often seems to me that those who believe the most in Divine Providence are those who most get themselves tied in theological knots when trying to appoint a priest or a bishop. I’m rather wary of Divine Providence myself and rather hope that God is wary of it as a concept too.

    Here at St Mary’s, we’re right in the thick of all this at the moment as we’re advertising for a Vice Provost. It is both exciting and nerve-wracking. Some people think we’re being too specific about some things in the job description and no doubt others think we’re not being specific enough about different things. I’m aware that the request for a video sermon with the application will put off people who might otherwise put in an application, but then we probably are looking for someone for whom using new tools in the Glorious Work fills them with life rather than dread. I’m also aware that we’re looking for someone who will enjoy being in a congregation that is very musical. We’re looking for someone who won’t feel like a fish out of water in a congregation that revels in using music to spread the news that the love of God is real though rather than looking for a Precentor by another name. The job itself is attested by both of those who have held the post before to be one of the most exciting jobs in all of God’s holy church – deep pastoral and theological conversations, often with younger people, are the stuff of life here. Helping to create worship that challenges, comforts, inspires and provokes is at the heart of what we do. And I often think that the congregation is perhaps the most interesting group of people who meet under one roof in all of Scotland. We’re a people who believe in trying to become ever more open, inclusive and welcoming – and if you want to know what I think that means, pick up the phone and give me a call.

    I’m one of those priests who likes working with colleagues and that’s not true of everyone. But collegiate patterns and styles of working are the stuff of normality in cathedral contexts and I’m glad they are.

    Just as people have complicated reasons for assessing whether they would appoint a cleric, so clerics have complicated ways of assessing whether it is for them. More than once I’ve known people say that they would like to come to work here but that they (or more often their partner) can’t cope with the idea of working in Glasgow as it is the Murder Capital of Europe. And the trouble is, no matter how many times I explain that Glasgow has one of the best stories in Europe for turning around knife crime and that we are a long way from deserving that title, they still keep running Taggart on the TV and people find themselves believing it. (It isn’t helped that some of the locations in Taggart were in the leafy West End – ie in and around the cathedral itself). For all its historical grit though, Glasgow goes on being green, gorgeous, gallus and gregarious.

    How we make decisions about these things can be deep, trivial, thoughtful, shallow, inspired, sometimes stemming from ignorance. sometimes from knowledge and yes sometimes because our heart simply stirs within us and there’s no other way of describing the work of God.

    And so we keep on watching, hoping and praying. Somehow, I think we all believe, God gets on with it.

    Just don’t ask me to explain exactly how.

20 responses to “Apologies have consequences too”

  1. Andrew Cain Avatar
    Andrew Cain

    You say so often and so eloquently what I feel.

    1. Father Ron Smith Avatar

      Food for serious thought, Father Kelvin. I don’t suppose there has been any objection raised by the Church of England Bishops about the liberalising ativity of our Norwegian partner’s in Christ. It is this continuing double-mindedness that exposes us Anglicans to the charge of structured hypocrisy. Keep up the good work you are doing on your web-site. Christ IS risen, Alleluia!

  2. Alan Wilson Avatar

    Thank you, Kelvin. It’s certainly a change of the mood music going on, but self-lacerating apologies are subject to the law of diminishing returns unless they indicate what we call “Metanoia” – change of mind, aka repentance. This means things real change. Without it, apologies breed cynicism, not hope. When, for example, a bishop tells us he is ashamed whenever he encounters homophobia in the church, curious minds want to ask him “when did you last encounter what you call homophobia in the church? What was it like? How was it separable from the ideology that validated it? And since it’s such a shameful thing, what are you going to do about it?”

    1. Kelvin Avatar

      The real disconnect for me is that Justin Welby is someone who clearly does know something about what reconcilliation is. He can’t have done that job in Coventry and not known and he can’t have named reconcilliation as one of the key strands of his time as Archbishop without knowing that metanoia is part of the deal if that is what you are chasing after.

      However, I can only come back again and again to the possibility that there are those who simply think that LGBT are indeed actually worth less than real people.

      1. June Butler Avatar
        June Butler

        Kelvin, after I read your words about the empty apologies by authorities in the church after which their behavior does not change, I could not help but think what you stated in your comment, that the leaders, with exceptions like Alan Wilson, believe LGTB folks are lesser. What else can we think? My advice would be to stop apologizing and be honest, which would be a step in the right direction, because at least the hypocrisy would end.

  3. adrian copping Avatar
    adrian copping

    Thank you for this. Something similar has been happening here in Wales in the past week or so where our Bishops have apologised AND issued some prayers which are authorised for use in connnection with ministry to LGBTI people. This is to be welcomed as a sign of a step in a positive direction but, at the same time, leaves a lot of questions and many disappointed.

  4. Bob Webster Avatar
    Bob Webster

    Saying it is a “constant source of deep sadness that people are persecuted for their sexuality” is not an apology. At best it is a request that someone should stop making him feel bad. That could be the people doing the persecuting, or it could be us who should just be quiet and preferably go away. An apology would be “I apologize for the hurt I have caused and as a consequence of recognizing my sin I will cease that behaviour and do everything I can to get others to stop as well.”

  5. Ruth Richards-Hill Avatar

    Kelvin, you are an expert at stating things so eloquently that makes everyone else in the Anglican communion squirm.

    I was not oblivious to the fact that as a lesbian woman I entered a family of churches with a huge diversity of attitudes towards my sexuality. It was only because of the grace and love of Jesus Christ that I felt safe to come into the church despite my “flaws” and receive baptism. Is my baptism any less valid because I am a lesbian?

    As a convert from Orthodox Judaism I suspect that I am sometimes more acutely aware than others at what should be in my mind a glaring hypocrisy. Rabbinical thought always looks for an alternatives to explain why a certain situation does or does not apply according to halachah (ecclesiastical law – much like the canons). But the balance either exists or it doesnt. Jesus speaks about divorce and makes it quite clear that its not really an option, while in rabbinical law, it certainly is an option. We are taught that he came to fulfil the law and yet we his church are part of a new covenant are we not? The church seems to have taken the easy way out and will marry people who have divorced, but will not marry gay couples. So if divorced people are part of the new covenant, why arent us gay folk?

    I could get into all the biblical quotation arguments and as someone that reads Classical Hebrew better than most Anglicans I know, I have no fear in taking a stand on my point. (My Greek needs a little more work however.) That said, I dont see a balanced biblical foundation for excluding some that are automatically excluded by literal translation of scripture, but not others, but rather an inherited bigotry and hypocrisy that continues to thrive simply to satisy the whims of member churches whose societies havent quite experienced the journey that ours has. While that doesnt invalidate their position, neither does it invalidate the position of our society and our spiritual progress should not be hindered to satisy the agenda of those religious leaders that appear to be pandering to the demands of those churches that have not walked the path of ours.

    I have arguments that cover more than simple translations and exegesis particularly surrounding what the rules were both before and after the death of Christ, but those are for another day. I know that I am a baptised Christian and Jesus loves me as much as any other, not because I am gay or straight, but because I am one of his, and therefore he wants me to thrive within his covenant rather than the stifling, unreasonable and hair splitting laws that came before – Ones that I personally know how incredibly impossible they are to live by, no matter what your sexuality, or colour, or intellectual ability. – I was there once.

    When our Bishops and leaders realise that Christ died exactly to make the Christian lives of the likes of me equally valid as straight people, then perhaps we’ll make a little more progress and not see these “apologies” as merely lip service. Its almost embarrassing to LGBT people for whom their faith is a core part of their lives. It certainly is for me.

  6. Ruth Harley Avatar

    Any child in my Sunday School group could tell you that repentance is not just “saying sorry” it is “saying sorry, being sorry, and changing”. Possibly ++Justin’s words make it as far as the first of these, but I’m not convinced they signify the second, and the third is nowhere in sight. Perhaps I should send my 5 year old theologians to Lambeth and/or Lusaka to explain! Or perhaps it’s just that those who are issuing these ‘apologies’ aren’t really thinking in terms of repentance, or seeing the need for it, at all.

  7. Mark Falby Avatar
    Mark Falby

    Apologies mean nothing if not backed by action.

  8. Junia Avatar
    Junia

    Well I did recently get brutally and spectacularly dumped by an American lesbian, so perhaps they just are naturally more wicked over there…

    In seriousness though, thank you for this wonderfully elegant post, Kelvin, summarising so much of what I have felt since ++Justin’s statement in January. I’m starting to get a little sick of being apologised to.

    1. Cynthia Avatar
      Cynthia

      Speaking as an American lesbian, I’m sure the Norwegian lesbians are much better people, and that we are “naturally more wicked…” 😉

      Kelvin expresses well the debacle of January. But interestingly, Justin just delivered an amazing sermon at ACC-16 that marks a major change of heart and theology if he’s sincere. We’ll see. A lot has happened since January.

      Have a look at the sermon, it’s in the Anglican Communion news. I’d hate to think that those are just empty words. Time will tell. But I want hope.

      1. Kelvin Avatar

        Could you point us towards the sermon, Cynthia. I’m not seeing anything at all that’s new in relation to the things I’ve written about above.

        1. Cynthia Katsarelis Avatar
          Cynthia Katsarelis

          Here it is: http://www.anglicannews.org/news/2016/04/new-calls-for-new-times-archbishop-welbys-presidential-address-to-acc-16.aspx

          To me this seems like a new direction, born of recent realities, and perhaps inspired by the Holy Spirit.

          Of course, my hopes could be typical, off-the-charts American optimism. We wicked American Episcopal lesbians just know that the Promised Land is at the end of the next rainbow.

          1. Kelvin Avatar

            Cynthia – this is what I was writing about above. It isn’t a new direction. It is what I’m complaining of. Talk of reconciliation whilst not engaging in it.

            There’s not a word in it about a new direction on the way the ABC relates to the Anglican Communion’s troubles. Not one.

          2. Cynthia Katsarelis Avatar
            Cynthia Katsarelis

            It seems like he was asking people to focus on the major characters, climate change and religious violence, and to work together within our diversity. That sounds like a new tack. Of course, it will be interesting to see if this translates into action. Will the discrimination against married clergy stop? Will the ABC stop pandering to the primates who didn’t show up to ACC-16?

            You might be right, you seem very prophetic to me. But I want you to be wrong this time. I want hope, and to work together on things that actually matter.

          3. Kelvin Avatar

            There are simply no signs of what you hope for, Cynthia. None.

          4. Cynthia Katsarelis Avatar
            Cynthia Katsarelis

            Perhaps not. But I was recently a TEC delegate to the UN Commission on the Status of Women where I met a posse of awesome women from the Anglican Communion Women delegation. We had great interaction and they affirmed a “walking together” statement they wrote in 2007. It says they are staying in communion, no matter what the guys do. We women in TEC are drafting a response, graciously receiving and affirming the statement. Against this, Justin doesn’t stand a chance and he might as well change his tune.

            PS. One of the awesome delegates was a Rachel from St. Andrew’s, Scotland.

  9. Richard Barnes Avatar
    Richard Barnes

    I was really hopeful about the Anglican Communion’s purpose from reading Rachael’s blogs from UN CSW last month. But not for long. ABC Welby’s Sermon reads like a random speech generator and says much the same as he’s been doing for months in global fora.
    It’s like a couple who talk about the garden and the difficult neighbours because they don’t want to talk about their sex life.
    Clever way to end ACC with everyone apparently united by talking about bigger issues.
    But to read ++Welby asking for nuanced theology, when he’s totally binary (Christian=happy, healthy, wealthy & wise) just made me laugh.

  10. Robin Avatar
    Robin

    > In the last week we’ve had the latest document on family life to come from the Vatican and it is very clear that there’s a change in tone from the current pope and it is hard not to welcome that.

    I don’t see any change of tone in the following, which is the beginning of paragraph 251 of “Amoris Laetitia”.

    > 251. In discussing the dignity and mission of
    the family, the Synod Fathers observed that, “as
    for proposals to place unions between homosexual
    persons on the same level as marriage,
    there are absolutely no grounds for considering
    homosexual unions to be in any way similar or
    even remotely analogous to God’s plan for marriage
    and family”.

    I’d call that a monumental snub, deliberately administered, or an equally deliberately administered drenching with cold water.

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