What is in Kelvin's Head?

  • The Cure

    Over the past few weeks, I’ve not been terribly well. Bronchitis was the doctor’s diagnosis and it has gone on and on.

    I thought it might be helpful to share the advice that I’ve been given in order to get better. After all, it could happen to you.

    • paracetamol
    • lemsip
    • going to the doctor
    • cough medicine
    • reflexology
    • vicks vapour rub
    • steroid inhaler
    • steaming
    • aromatherapy
    • eating oranges
    • look after yourself
    • steam room at the Arlington baths
    • don’t use the steam room at the Arlington baths
    • go out in the fresh air
    • stay in
    • decongestant
    • garlic
    • orange juice
    • vitamin C tablets
    • multivitamins
    • menthol crystals
    • staying under the duvet
    • making sure you don’t get too hot
    • opening the windows
    • going to Millport for three months
    • make sure you’re getting proper food
    • look after yourself
    • watch the television
    • don’t just watch the television
    • lots of vegetables
    • the triduum
    • incense
    • tea-tree oil
    • fasting
    • antibiotics
    • more antibiotics
    • sleep
    • rest
    • jakeman’s throat sweets
    • fisherman’s friends
    • hot tea
    • honey in your tea
    • manuka honey
    • lots of hot drinks
    • let it take its course
    • steamy showers
    • a bit of sun
    • go to the doctor again
    • you must go to the doctor again
    • stay off work
    • just take another week being kind to yourself
    • hot toddies
    • whisky
    • chocolate

    I presume, as I am still sneezing and coughing that I’ve missed something. No doubt someone will helpfully give me some further advice.

     

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4 responses to “Will no-one rid me of this turbulent plumber?”

  1. Avatar
    Anonymous

    Re: Will no-one rid me of this turbulent plumber?
    Argh!

    Latest update.

    I seem to be living in a parallel universe. I have been captured by plumbing aliens and have been taken to planet plumber. Either that or I am the living embodiment of a plumber’s online adventure game.

    The latest is that there is a crack in the hot water tank between the heating coil and the tank containing domestic hot water. Thus the tank needs to be changed. No useable hot water until this is done next week.

    This means showers instead of baths. (When will I get to think?). Boiling washing up water. No use of the washing machine. Fortunately I still have the dishwasher, which comes off the cold water supply and also the heating, so the house is not cold.

    However it appears that most of next week will be spent waiting for plumbers as well.

    Reply
  2. Avatar
    Anonymous

    Re: Will no-one rid me of this turbulent plumber?
    Easy solution.  Do what I do –  take your washing to your mother!

    Sorted!!!!!!!!!

    Reply
  3. Avatar
    Anonymous

    Re: Will no-one rid me of this turbulent plumber?
    How I am supposed to be a mystic visionary with all this going on?
    *politely puts hand up*
    Um, aren’t mystic visionaries supposed to go without certain creature comforts in order to have such visions???? This will surely help, no?
    Alternatively, you could give up hot water for Lent.

    Reply
  4. Avatar
    Anonymous

    Re: Will no-one rid me of this turbulent plumber?
    Well, I don’t find it particularly difficult to imagine St Anthony making his way to the desert wadi looking for clear water, finding only muddy guck and crying: “How I am supposed to be a mystic visionary with all this going on?”

    Reply

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