What is in Kelvin's Head?

  • Missional – Your Time Has Come

    Hear Ye! Hear Ye!

    I hereby announce an international competition to rid the ears of the godly of a peculiar modern ugliness. Everywhere I go (and I’ve recently been engaged on a quest to go just about everywhere) I’m hearing the word MISSIONAL used in church circles. It seems to me that this is a modern phenomenon and one from which we need to be freed.

    How long, oh Lord, how long? How long will you let your church think it can succeed in bringing your love to the world whilst it mangles English grammar?

    Is it not enough that we have kidnapped the word INTENTIONAL and used it for our own devices and desires. It was clearly a sin for whoever first added those two little letters to have created such a hybrid monster. Greater though was the sin of those who GIFTED it from one Christian community to another.

    No, no, and a thousand times no. Missional will not do.

    Yet the trouble is, what should we use instead? Is there a simple word or very short phrase that is more acceptable to holy earlugs than missional?

    I declare a competition to find something else. Bring out your simplicity. Wash your spotless grammatical linen in public. Wear your loveliest past participles on your sleeve. Offer up your adjectives. Pour a gentle libation of adverbs before the altar of the Lord.

    Please, please. Offer an alternative.

    Suggestions welcome in the comments below.

    A crown of laurel to the winner.

    , ,

4 responses to “How to be Single at Christmas – repost”

  1. Stephen C Avatar
    Stephen C

    What wise stuff!

    Reply
  2. Jackie Heatlie Avatar
    Jackie Heatlie

    How wonderful it sounds – no- one to cook for etc, just pleasing yourself. I’ll take a leaf out of your book & set aside a day when Andrew & I can do this with a slight alteration so 2 of us can do it.

    Reply
  3. Dharma Avatar
    Dharma

    To be with yourself at Christmas is one of those things that most people avoid. Probably because they have been told that they must be with family, friends. Otherwise they are people who have no families etc. I’m not sure what I will do yet. Going to stay with my mum and brother is OK. What I don’t like is the food, overcooked or cold or something. Anyway will post afterwards, might be just was alone. Possibly arrested for attacking someone. 😊

    Reply
  4. Suzette van Rooyen Avatar
    Suzette van Rooyen

    Inspirational writing! Love it, and its just what I’ve done for Christmas. Wishing you all a Blessed Christmas

    Reply

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