What is in Kelvin's Head?

  • Mr Provost’s Finest Reindeer Receipt

    Roughly chop a leek, couple of slices of bacon and as many cloves of garlic as you dare.

    Heat a frying pan to a sizzle and fling the leek, bacon and garlic in, closely followed by the reindeer steaks.

    After five minutes turn the steaks over and scoop the leek/pig/garlic into another pan.

    Heat this as far as you dare and tip in enough cheap gin to make you wonder whether this is a waste of good gin.

    Throw in a handful of blueberries

    Heat until kitchen is covered in fog reminiscent of the incense at midnight mass.

    Remove from heat and gently stir in several good dollops of crème fraîche.

    Rudolph steaks will now be ready having cooked for a further five minutes. Artfully plate them up and cover with the sauce that will now be advent coloured.

    Serve with oven roasted potato, butternut squash, red pepper, courgette ensemble.

8 responses to “How to Cook Moose”

  1. Jaye Richards-Hill Avatar
    Jaye Richards-Hill

    And this is all in Maryhill? There will be great wailing and gnashing of teeth in Newton Mearns and Giffnock when the news gets out..

    Reply
  2. Zebadee Avatar
    Zebadee

    At our local Lidl we also have quail as well as the other items you mention

    Reply
    1. kelvin Avatar
      kelvin

      Quail here too. Quail eggs from Waitrose though, not yet Lidl.

      Reply
  3. Kimberly Avatar
    Kimberly

    West Enders eat moose. South Siders eat Wholefoods. I know where I’d rather be.

    Reply
    1. kelvin Avatar
      kelvin

      I’m not at all sure that any shop selling a few nuts and bits and bobs of fresh veg on either side of the river can be as impressive as Moose in Maryhill.

      Reply
  4. Zebadee Avatar
    Zebadee

    Does the Maryhill Lidl also offer Canadian Lobster? Not that I am bragging but the needy of the Rubarb Triangle need some joy in their lives and our Lidl is meeting this need

    Reply
  5. Kelvin Avatar
    Kelvin

    Yes, lobster is on offer in Maryhill.

    I choose not to crow about lobster for it comes from the sea and consequently should not be eaten.

    Reply
    1. Margaret of the Sea of Galilee Avatar
      Margaret of the Sea of Galilee

      The kashrut/OT problem is the lack of fins and scales, not the sea per se.

      Reply

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