What is in Kelvin's Head?

  • The Cure

    Over the past few weeks, I’ve not been terribly well. Bronchitis was the doctor’s diagnosis and it has gone on and on.

    I thought it might be helpful to share the advice that I’ve been given in order to get better. After all, it could happen to you.

    • paracetamol
    • lemsip
    • going to the doctor
    • cough medicine
    • reflexology
    • vicks vapour rub
    • steroid inhaler
    • steaming
    • aromatherapy
    • eating oranges
    • look after yourself
    • steam room at the Arlington baths
    • don’t use the steam room at the Arlington baths
    • go out in the fresh air
    • stay in
    • decongestant
    • garlic
    • orange juice
    • vitamin C tablets
    • multivitamins
    • menthol crystals
    • staying under the duvet
    • making sure you don’t get too hot
    • opening the windows
    • going to Millport for three months
    • make sure you’re getting proper food
    • look after yourself
    • watch the television
    • don’t just watch the television
    • lots of vegetables
    • the triduum
    • incense
    • tea-tree oil
    • fasting
    • antibiotics
    • more antibiotics
    • sleep
    • rest
    • jakeman’s throat sweets
    • fisherman’s friends
    • hot tea
    • honey in your tea
    • manuka honey
    • lots of hot drinks
    • let it take its course
    • steamy showers
    • a bit of sun
    • go to the doctor again
    • you must go to the doctor again
    • stay off work
    • just take another week being kind to yourself
    • hot toddies
    • whisky
    • chocolate

    I presume, as I am still sneezing and coughing that I’ve missed something. No doubt someone will helpfully give me some further advice.

     

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5 responses to “St Strumpet?”

  1. Mary Brown Avatar
    Mary Brown

    How about the wife of Jesus, airbrushed out of the story by later misogynist Christians? See Starbird, M “The Woman with the Alabaster Jar” and other books by her. She is an ex-Catholic who set out to refute the Holy Blood, Holy Grail story and ended by being convinced that Jesus and Mary were a married pair (and an archetype of the male/female balance principle). There’s a wonderful window in Kilmore Church, Mull. Check it out – whoever created it intended it to represent J and M as husband and wife, and M is clearly pregnant. Of course, there is no unchallengeable evidence that Jesus was married, but what I would like to ask the sceptics is why, given that He was the word made flesh and dwelt among us, is it unacceptable for Him to have been a sexual being? Why have later Christians considered sexuality, even in a loving relationship, to be something disgusting? Because they have, we are now stuck with the nasty views of the NotW brigade that sex is either an acceptable leisure activity or something gross. As Margaret Starbird points out, if we restored Mary as Jesus’ beloved consort we would be creating a much more wholesome myth!

    Reply
    1. kelvin Avatar
      kelvin

      It is a little like the arguments that might be made of the relationship between Jesus and the beloved disciple though, isn’t it? All very attractive and neat if you come from a particular point of view but not really backed up with enough evidence apart from modern presumption, presupposition and desire.

      Reply
  2. ryan Avatar
    ryan

    I think the arguments on Jesus being married are very far from being liberationary. Rather, they’re the natural end-point of the Evangelical mindset that homophobically (and unbiblically) divides the world into Normal Heterosexual Married types and the demonised Other. “It is better to marry than burn” might have some mysognistic readings conducive to the fundamentalist world-view, but it hardly most naturally supports the idolatarisation of particular heterosexual relationships.

    If I had a pound for every time a nominal Sola Scriptura type had told me that St.Paul had to have been married (presumably because Our Lord’s asceticism and disinterest in heterosexual marriage is bad enough) then I would be a very rich man indeed 😉

    Interesting post Kelvin! Had no idea that St.Mary M even had red hair Perhaps she could be reclaimed as the Patron Saint of Gingers and Other Persecuted Minorities? 🙂

    Reply
    1. kelvin Avatar
      kelvin

      Oh, her hair was red, Ryan. Flaming Red I believe.

      Reply
  3. ryan Avatar
    ryan

    How reginal! 😉

    Reply

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