What is in Kelvin's Head?

  • Tales of the City – February 2020

    On the way home from the opera I step into a shop to get out of the rain, and buy something to eat against the cold – a late-night post-operatic chittery-bite.

    In front of me are two young men dressed in much less than I am. They are the worse for wear and arguing.

    Drunk Young Man #1: Well we’ll ask someone else then.

    Drunk Young Man #2:     Yes! Someone neutral.

    They turn to me.

    DYM#1: Here man. Settle an arugment for us will you. Is coronavirus real or is it propoganda

    Self: I think it is real.

    DYM#2: Aye man. Told you. It *is* real. He said so. Here, I bet you do a very responsible job

    DYM#1:     Aye very responsible. What are you man?

    I hesitate a moment and consider how to answer.

    DYM#2: I bet he’s a Supply Chain Manager. Are you a Supply Chain Manager, man?

    I smile a smile that I hope will look like the smile of a cold wet Supply Chain Manager.

    DYM#2: I knew it.

    DYM#1: Hey, do you have a lighter?

    I shake my head.

    We are all forlorn that I do not have a lighter.

7 responses to “What people are searching for”

  1. ryan Avatar
    ryan

    Some of these ring a bell, but am deeply curious as to what the the Scottish Episcopal Tartan is! Creation of the (divinely-inspired?) knitting-group? 🙂

    Reply
    1. kelvin Avatar
      kelvin

      You’ve forgotten that I am Episcopal Arbiter of The Kilt, Ryan.

      See here and here.

      Reply
  2. Brother David Avatar
    Brother David

    Do you teach that last topic personally Padre, or have you farmed that out to others more expert?

    😉

    Reply
  3. kelvin Avatar
    kelvin

    I may take exception to the idea that anyone is more expert.

    Reply
  4. Rosemary Hannah Avatar
    Rosemary Hannah

    All I know about strip-tease for beginners is that blokes need to remember to take their socks off as the first item. Really.

    Reply
  5. kelvin Avatar
    kelvin

    Never let it be said that the comments on this blog do not contain the world’s greatest wisdom

    Reply
  6. Brother David Avatar
    Brother David

    The only time that I recall my Roberto, of blessed memory, taking off his socks, was when bathing or swimming!

    Reply

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