• How to sleep on the sleeper

    Did I mention that I came back from London on the sleeper? It remains my favourite way of travelling back from south to north as you can catch it after a night at the theatre. (In this case Democracy at the Old Vic). Generally I prefer to fly down and sleeper back.

    Here are my Caledonian Sleeper tips….

    • Don’t believe the time that they advertise as when the sleeper will be ready for boarding. It is often later than that.
    • Leaving a big city at midnight by train is inherently romantic.
    • Being in Euston at 11.30 pm is inherently unromantic.
    • For excitement, intrigue, value for money and frisson book a bargain berth and share with Who Knows Who.
    • If sharing with an unknown companion who has not arrived when the train leaves, don’t presume anything. He could show up anytime, anywhere.
    • For a better night’s sleep pay more and get a cabin to yourself.
    • For no sleep at all, use the reclining seats. You will however, learn much about humanity.
    • Don’t worry about sleeping – tell yourself that all you have to do is doze and you’ll probably fall asleep anyway.
    • The more you pay, the better the breakfast in bed.
    • Murmur in the steward’s ear as you get on that you’d prefer your breakfast to be served after everyone else if possible
    • Beware of muddling the buttons that open the toilet compartment with the adjacent buttons which open the disabled cabin next door. (Especially at 4 am).
    • Flipflops.
    • Travelling North to South on certain tickets give you access to a lounge at Euston with free showers. No such luck coming the other way.
    • If turfed off the sleeper at 7 am and going to work at 9 am, don’t go home and go to sleep. Go swimming instead.
    • You can charge phones in the lounge car but not in your cabin.
    • That little hook by your head is for putting your watch on, but don’t forget it in the morning.
    • Take extra water.
    • The first stop is Carlisle. The stop with all the shunting is Carstairs.
    • Don’t go for a wander before Carstairs or your cabin might go to Glasgow whilst you go to Edinburgh.
    • You might arrive going a different direction to the one you set off in. Don’t be confused, they’ve not turned you round and sent you back to London after all.

    Any tips I missed?


5 responses to “Predictions for 2020”

  1. Meg Rosenfeld Avatar
    Meg Rosenfeld

    As an American of the Democratic persuasion, I hope you’re right about the upcoming presidential election . . . and fear that you’re right about the division of the country. Having gay friends who are devout Roman Catholics, I desperately hope you’re right about the Roman church becoming more supportive of LGBT folks. And I guess we can only keep praying about Equal Marriage in the Church of England. Probably it’s just a good idea to keep praying, eh?!

  2. Rosemary Hannah Avatar
    Rosemary Hannah

    I think 6 is a certainty. I hope 8 isn’t. I think Starmer is the better choice.

  3. Robert McLean Avatar
    Robert McLean

    Re No. 5, what is COP?

    1. Kelvin Avatar

      COP is the Conference of the Parties which will be held in Glasgow this year. It is the largest international conference on Climate Change at which governments and many other organisations are present.

  4. Chris Avatar

    I find myself wondering which reason will lie behind 1 – because a referendum won’t be called, or because people will still, for some reason, think it’s a good idea to hang on to Westminster rule. And I agree with 6 and with Rosemary about Starmer – who would seem to have emerged as the front runner.

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