What is in Kelvin's Head?

  • Tales of the City #8

    The scene is Glasgow Pride. The protagonists are making their way down Argyll Street in Finnieston. I am dressed in a black suit, clerical collar and small lapel ribbon in all the colours of the rainbow. The group I am with all carry colourful posters proclaiming “The Scottish Episcopal Church Welcomes You”. Mine is mauve. 

    A young man sidles up to walk beside me.

    Young Man: Hi!

    Self: Hello! Where are you from?

    Young Man: Well, Australia, actually. 

    The Young Man pauses.

    Young Man: I just, er, I just wanted to ask you something.

    Self: Oh, OK, ask away.

    Young Man: Well, are you real?

    Self: Oh yes, I’m very real.

    The Young Man gestures with his head towards the Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence who, beautifully bedecked in Catherine Laboré style wimples and rainbow habits of various styles are waving a large rainbow flag in front of us.

    Young Man: Yes, but the nuns?

    The Young Man pauses.

    Young Man: They are not real. Right?

    Self: Right.

     

    ,

18 responses to “Biretta Watch – Snowy Day”

  1. Lay clerk Avatar
    Lay clerk

    Hats are old hat. What you really need is a papal ombrellino to keep the snow off! Then you could wear a wooly hat under it which no one would notice because they’d all be so impressed by what you were carrying. Or maybe what the server was carrying for you.

    Reply
  2. kelvin Avatar
    kelvin

    Don’t think for a moment, Lay Clerk, that I have not used such a liturgical essential whilst worshipping the Lord in Scotland.

    I most certainly have, though not to keep the snow off.

    Reply
  3. Lay clerk Avatar
    Lay clerk

    Heaven forfend that I would even consider for a fleeting moment that you had not taken advantage of the full panoply of liturgical sex-aids available!

    Reply
  4. David |Dah • veed| Avatar
    David |Dah • veed|

    I am sure that the proper term Lay Clerk is paraments!

    Reply
  5. Jeff Queen Avatar
    Jeff Queen

    I do like the biretta when traveling…will be wearing one this weekend in the St. Patrick’s day parade. Just a thought, maybe you should change the name of the site to “What’s on Kelvin’s Head.” Just a thought.

    Reply
  6. Paul Avatar
    Paul

    Have been trying desperately to find a Canterbury Cap these last few weeks. Seems no-one makes or sells them anymore!
    A shame, as my former parish was the home of Lancelot Andrewes and they are celebrating his contribution to the translation of the KJB during a Festival Weekend, 24/25 September. I so wanted to wear a hat more in sympathy with the 17th century!
    I shall either default to a skullcap or a biretta, I guess….
    😉

    Reply
  7. Rosemary Hannah Avatar
    Rosemary Hannah

    Some academic head gear (doctoral level) is based on the Canterbury Cap – try academic outfitters.

    Reply
  8. Kennedy Avatar
    Kennedy

    I think I saw +Idris sporting one at the TISEC award ceremony.

    Maybe he’ll know where to get one.

    Reply

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