• Tales of the City #9

    The scene is Great Western Road, at 10 am – just after morning prayer. A street cleaner in a council jacket runs down the street hollaring at me after morning prayer

    Street Cleaner: “Oi, oi!”

    I turn wondering what I’ve done.

    Self: “Um, yes?”

    Street Clearner: “Was it youse that was in the paper? It was, it was youse”

    I wait expecting a stream of Glasgow invective.

    His eyes light up, he beams a toothless smile and responds: “Hey man, hey, that was just great.”

    He’s referring to this piece in the Herald.

2 responses to “10 Things I learned from being a General Election Candidate”

  1. Father David Avatar
    Father David

    Your second point about people knowing almost nothing about the democratic process was demonstrated admirably in a recent television programme called “Educating Joey Essex”. The young man in question who came to fame via TOWIE interviewed three leaders of Political Parties – Messrs Clegg, Miliband and Farage (Mr. Cameron declined to be interviewed). By the end of the programme Joey had learned that Parliament was an institution rather than a person.
    May I add an eleventh point to your list of ten?
    In American Presidential elections it is often said that the candidate with the most hair usually wins (that bodes well for Hillary Clinton). I will stick my head above the parapet and say that the leader who wears a tie (i.e. Looking most Statesman like) will become Prime Minister. Throughout the campaign Mr. Miliband has consistently been seen wearing a tie and a smart suit while Mr. Cameron has been seen wearing an open neck shirt with rolled up sleeves and Mr. Clegg similarly attired with open neck shirt and a casual blue jumper. I therefore foresee that Ed Miliband will gain the keys to Number 10 following tomorrow’s General Election. Despite protestations to the contrary he will probably do so with the assistance of the admirable and formidable Nicola Sturgeon who is also a model of sartorial elegance. however my theory is at its weakest when looking at the way the leader of Ukip is also similarly smartly attired but thankfully and mercifully Nigel hadn’t a hope in hell of winning! Mind what does it say of our electoral system is the SNP get 5% of the vote and are rewarded with 50 seats and Ukip get 10% of the vote and only win 2 seats? Having said that, I’m still a first past the post man.

    1. Tim Avatar

      I’m still a PR chap but that scenario is a great argument in favour of FPTP 😉

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