What is in Kelvin's Head?

  • Society Against Sundays in the Month

    Why is there no church society for those of us who believe that Sundays-in-the-Month are one of the works of darkness that beset the church and tempt it into doom and decline?

    You know the kind of thing I mean – Matins on the first Sunday in the month and Eucharist on the rest. Or modern liturgy every Sunday except when there is a fifth Sunday in the month when it shall be the language of the Scottish Prayer Book 1928 1929. Or 10.30 am Sung Eucharist every week except the 2nd Sunday in the month when it is matins with the Methodists. Or First and Fourth Sundays in Auchendoggle, third Sunday in Auchendrizzle and a united service on the fourth Sunday in the month – see the church porch notice for details.

    I’d be interested in any research in this area. Is it the case that there is a statistical correlation between decline and those practising the doctrine of Sundays in the Month?

    Isn’t every notice which includes an intimation about the Sunday in the Month speaking to the world of a congregation either divided by compromise or prepared to announce its decline to the world?

    Why do we never talk about this?

7 responses to “Liturgical news”

  1. PamB Avatar
    PamB

    Apart from the outbreak of throat-blessings, I noticed none of this, despite being about three yards from it. Had the Shoes been other than black, however, I’d have spotted them from a mile away. #pedantalert.

    Reply
    1. kelvin Avatar
      kelvin

      Proof positive that some time spent in a good liturgical finishing school early in a clerical career pays dividends later on.

      Reply
  2. Revruth Avatar
    Revruth

    I don’t know why but the phrase ‘flailing jellyfish’ has made me laugh so much that I nearly had an accident. We’ve all done it and now it will be made worse by thinking of that phrase each time. Thank you.

    Reply
    1. Fr Dougal Avatar
      Fr Dougal

      “Provost turns into a flailing jellyfish”? It’s like an episode of Dr Who! Blue Book instead of blue Tardis but otherwise….

      Reply
  3. PMo Avatar
    PMo

    And it’s claimed that I’m ‘special’!!

    Reply
  4. Rhea Avatar
    Rhea

    i got a good chuckle out of this. Thanks for sharing 🙂

    Reply
  5. Andrew H Avatar
    Andrew H

    Sounds par for the course at our Sunday 1030 masses… such events and little mishaps keep us all on our toes. And, of course, invariably performed with due reverence, and in the best possible taste….!

    Reply

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