• Can you backdate a marriage?

    Marriage Register

    How interesting to learn about the new rules that will govern couples in England and Wales who have been in a Civil Partnership who wish to change (upgrade?) their relationship status to a marriage.

    It seems that they are going to be able to do so easily and will receive a “backdated” marriage certificate which will state that their marriage began when they entered into their Civil Partnership.

    I’ve some reservations about this but I know it will be warmly welcomed by many and it would be churlish to oppose it.

    It is interesting though and there will be pressure now in Scotland for the Scottish Government to do the same.

    Here are some obvious issues.

    • It is quite odd to think that some might find themselves to have been married without their, at the time they entered into their marriage, believing that they wanted to be married.
    • People who have been blessing Civil Partnerships are going to find that they’ve been blessing marriages all along.
    • People will be able, I think, to find themselves married who never went through any ceremony at all – they may simply have signed the papers. (This is a new thing).
    • There’s no doubt going to be some grumpiness from those who trusted the politicians who said that Civil Partnerships were definately not marriages and that it had been invented in order to do something different to marriage.
    • In a sense, it is rewriting history. People are going to have marriage certificates that date from a time when they were not in fact married at all.
    • The Bishops of the Church of England in the House of Lords might feel that the Government has pulled the rug out from under them.
    • I think, that people can end up married whose proposal to marry has never been published either by banns on in a registrar’s office. I’ll be interested to see whether the registrars publish the names of those converting their status. My guess is that they won’t and thus people will end up married in law who have never had their intent to enter marriage advertised to anyone.
    • It is quite odd to think that a status like marriage can be backdated. Is there any comparable status that can be changed like that?

    Personally, I would have preferred the solution to be that people would get new full marriage certificates when they requested to change their relationship status into a marriage. I think this because I think that marriage ought to require a clear statement of consent at the time it is entered into. (Indeed, many of the rules surrounding marriage are about getting unambiguous consent from both parties, freely given).

    Interesting times. Uncomfortable times for the churches, particularly the Church of England.

    Photo Credit – Dale Gillard Copyright: Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 2.0 Generic (CC BY-NC-SA 2.0)

     

11 responses to “Ruth Innes RIP”

  1. Bill Robertson Avatar
    Bill Robertson

    So sorry to hear of Ruth’s death. She was a character you only meet once in a lifetime. RIP. 🙏

  2. Gillian Avatar
    Gillian

    Thanks for this lovely tribute to Ruth. Ruth also served at St Mark’s Portobello (until 2010 – in between the Falkirk and Linlithgow stints I think) and is fondly remembered there by her little flock.

    1. Kelvin Avatar

      My apologies for missing that out in the first draft. I’ll add it in.

  3. Gillian Avatar
    Gillian

    Thanks Kelvin.

  4. Rosemary Hannah Avatar
    Rosemary Hannah

    Ruth had, also, a huge ability to sus out the gifts of others and to use them in a way that brought them fulfilment. It never put her off that others (often) regarded that person as a bit too marginal to use. Ruth made me feel useful- a gift both precious and rare. She also had the rare gift of good, solid fury. Gore Vidal had a set of essays ‘on our own now’ , his reaction to Eleanor Roosevelt’s death. Ruth is gone. We are on our own now.

  5. Gordon Reid Avatar
    Gordon Reid

    Thank you, Kelvin, for this lovely tribute to Mother Ruth. She came to visit me in Philadelphia and was an instant hit among my friends. As you’ve said, she combined the kindness and compassion of a pastor with a glorious, bubbling sense of humour. Heaven will suit her!

  6. Patricia Cant Avatar
    Patricia Cant

    Kelvin you have captured the Ruth I knew and loved, so thank you. I am missing being able to chat with her but I’ll keep chatting to her in my prayers. Tomorrow will be a celebration of the life a special lady. May she rest in peace and she will rise in glory.

  7. Cliff Piper Avatar
    Cliff Piper

    Kelvin thank you so much for writing. Ruth was a very special person and even in her increasingly poor health continued to support and encourage me in coping with my own illness. May she rest in peace and rise in purple.

  8. Bob King Avatar
    Bob King

    She was an amazing person, priest and friend. She rescued me at my first Clergy Conference which had not been a good experience for me up
    to the point when she said “sit here Bob” A person I admired, respected and was always a wee bit scared of as she would always put me right when I needed it.
    God Bless you Ruth 😍

  9. Sally Avatar
    Sally

    Thanks Kelvin, this is Ruth, and more. One of those people once met never forgotten. A loyal and loving friend who I am going to miss very much.

  10. Gareth Saunders Avatar

    💜 The world has felt somewhat less colourful and bright this week. May she rest in peace and rise in purple, indeed. 💜

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