What is in Kelvin's Head?

Exodus or Exodon’t

20/06/2013

There was a possibly extraordinary shift in the ecclesiastical tectonic plates overnight. Exodus International is going out of business and its leader has apologised for the harm it has done.

Exodus International was one of the leading groups which claimed that it was possible to re-orientate gay people – ie turn them straight. It is, or perhaps now, was, the leading light of the religious “ex-gay” movement. I never encountered the organisation directly but I did meet people who did and have heard some horrible stories of people being pyschologically damaged by that kind of thing. To put it bluntly, some people killed themselves because of the policies promoted by organisations like Exodus.

The President of the organisation has now issued an apology which on first sight appears to be quite far reaching.

I am sorry for the pain and hurt that many of you have experienced. I am sorry some of you spent years working through the shame and guilt when your attractions didn’t change. I am sorry we promoted sexual orientation change efforts and reparative theories about sexual orientation that stigmatized parents.

I am sorry I didn’t stand up to people publicly ‘on my side’ who called you names like sodomite—or worse. I am sorry that I, knowing some of you so well, failed to share publicly that the gay and lesbian people I know were every bit as capable of being amazing parents as the straight people that I know. I am sorry that when I celebrated a person coming to Christ and surrendering their sexuality to Him, I callously celebrated the end of relationships that broke your heart. I am sorry I have communicated that you and your families are less than me and mine.

Well it is hard not to welcome that.

So, Exodus International is going out of business? All is well?

Well, we’ll see. Part of Alan Chambers’s statement which is not being picked up by everyone reporting this is the following:

I cannot apologize for my deeply held biblical beliefs about the boundaries I see in scripture surrounding sex, but I will exercise my beliefs with great care and respect for those who do not share them. I cannot apologize for my beliefs about marriage. But I do not have any desire to fight you on your beliefs or the rights that you seek. My beliefs about these things will never again interfere with God’s command to love my neighbor as I love myself.

Hmm, well that does sound like Archbishop Sentamu this week saying that the church should be nicer to gay people during a speech in which he was trying to restrict and limit gay people’s human rights.

Moving forward, we will serve in our pluralistic culture by hosting thoughtful and safe conversations about gender and sexuality, while partnering with others to reduce fear, inspire hope, and cultivate human flourishing.

And indeed they’ve started to set up a new “ministry” called Reduce Fear. But what’s that all about. Doesn’t sound like working for justice to me. Sounds like Exodus has stopped being an anti-gay brigade, which is to be applauded but is turning itself into a Celibacy Brigade instead. (Which is not).

Ah well, by their fruits we shall know them, as St Paul so rightly suggested.

Alan Chambers, apology, ex-gay, Exodus International

8 responses to “Synod Review – things you might have missed”

kelvin

10/06/2012

COMMENTING POLICY

Someone has tried to leave an anonymous comment making an allegation against someone in our church, that specific instances of bullying have been covered up.

Whatever my sympathies are about the issue in general or what it being said in this case in particular, it is my view that dealing with this kind of thing through leaving an anonymous comment on a blog is neither an appropriate nor fruitful way forward. Indeed, my guess is that any anti-bullying policy worth its salt would argue that such a comment was itself an inappropriate behaviour in church circles.

There is a grievance procedure in the church. If the person who left the comment would like to contact me by email or phone, I would be happy to point them towards the most appropriate way of dealing with the unfinished business which is causing them concern.

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chris

10/06/2012

Glad you had the energy to write this up so soon. I’d be interested in the further pursuit of the perceived irregularities with the Reserved Sacrament – but right now I have to get out to an entirely lay-led RS communion …

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Sarah Murray

10/06/2012

It would be great to see the stats more widely available, they are quite difficult to get hold of- having written a paper on secularization and the SEC this year- stats were the first place to start to look at the trends and whether they matched the general trends etc. however I had to go around the houses to find them and then there were some considerable gaps. The census data unfortunately doesn’t include SEC as a separate category and therefore we have no picture from that data either. The patterns and the implications are hugely important picture for the future of the church.

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Suz Cate

10/06/2012

First, I offer thanks for the glimpse at a sister-church’s inner workings. Fascinating!

I’m so sorry to hear that your preparation for ordained ministry included bullying. My personal experience here in TEC of the USA has been entirely supportive and not a bit confrontational (which isn’t to say it hasn’t been probing at times), but I’m aware of colleagues whose “process” has definitely included some bullying, and it is disgraceful.

Your observation that “by such small mercies that great social change happens” is apt. I’ve seen that principle in action in our diocesan convention, in the pews of multiple parishes, and, more significantly for a native of the southern US, in the hundreds of daily situations in which persons of all different sorts have access to what were in former times the exclusive privileges of white upper class.

The fact that there are still unspoken and unseen barriers to truly free access (here I’m thinking of my African American friends who feel the need to teach their sons to avoid encounters with the police, for instance) bears witness to the need to include as contributors and consultants the subjects of projects such as the Grosvenor Essay.

Data matter. Even outliers are meaningless without the context of the data.

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Melissa Holloway

12/06/2012

I believe in small mercies – but the genesis of the small mercy mentioned here is a voice of leadership and power. In my southern USA diocese, as far as I can tell, the bishop’s voice goes in a different direction.

Also, there is a ‘once upon a time’ that I think pertains not just to the Anglican Covenant, but also to the full inclusion of gay people in the church:

“Once upon a time, I would have been on my feet encouraging, threatening, cajoling. Iâ€™d have been sowing fear, uncertainty and doubt. I would have been at work behind the scenes, bending peopleâ€™s ears, twisting peopleâ€™s arms â€“ ”

To risk being coy- as I was recently exhorted, we wait for the holy spirit here.

I rejoice for this episode in the Scottish Episcopal Church, but it doesn’t make me feel so sanguine about my own life in the church. I hope for the day when a bishop I can claim says such a thing in a diocesan convention and then also for the day when everyone just wonders what the nibbles will be.

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revruth

12/06/2012

I wasn’t there nor did I manage to catch up on the talk about the deaconate online, but I wonder if anyone mentioned how this was going to be financed. Ordaining lots of deacons might be a very nice thing indeed, but I wonder if there is money for this. I reckon there are few churches who could afford both, so…?

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Christian

12/06/2012

Fr Kelvin,

It’s sad but not surprising to read your reporting on the SEC Synod debate about ministry. I am utterly perplexed to read that folks in this day and age think that someone coming straight from college knew nothing about the world. This is one of the reasons why I think that SEC will continue to struggle to attract younger members of our communities if they will not be accepeted (given the opportunity) and recognized for who they are and what they bring–Freshness, passion, zeal, strength, etc.

However, I thank God for the grace and boldness given to our Primus to respond robustly to such ill-thought notions like: [There were calls for more non-stipendiaries working â€œnot in the parish but in the worldâ€ and also for us to focus on those who have â€œlife-experienceâ€ to be sought for ministry and not those coming â€œstraight from college who know nothing about the worldâ€.]

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Julie

17/06/2012

Provost Kelvin

It was refreshing to read the various reflections in the special edition of Inspires on-line post Synod 2012.
Where there were any differences, when I compared the above with your Review, from my perspective, I felt your description was more measured & accurate.

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